ABOUT YOUR SLIGHT SADNESS, BOREDOM, FATIGUE
Let’s talk about your slight sadness, that air of boredom, that continual undercurrent of fatigue, shall we?
The part of you which you often think you’ve finally shifted, you’re busy, you’re distracted, you’re DOING the thing of working to BE the thing, and so for a minute –
maybe three, maybe even a few days – !
You don’t notice it.
But then, sure enough, back it comes.
The restlessness.
The ever so slight (although at times less so!) sense of being dragged down a little.
The mild contractedness.
The SIGH, as you think about all there still is to do, and all the ways in which you’re not being fully you. The ENDLESSNESS of it all. The way that, if you’re honest, you just feel TIRED a lot of the time.
Is it normal, to feel this continual DRAIN-Y sort of vibe just lingering over you in the background? Somehow simultaneously feeling rushed and busy and under the pump with the EVERYTHING you’re trying to juggle in your life, while at the same time, actually –
Being bored as all get out, most of the time!
Maybe it’s part and parcel of being an adult.
Of life, specially in THIS current age.
Or of the simple freaking fact that you’re trying to create the dreams of 10 people simultaneously, just for starters, while not quite fully taking care of yourself, and you’re just a bit overloaded with everything you think you SHOULD still be doing, sorting, figuring out, putting in place!
Maybe.
And maybe it’s fine. After all, you’re damn good at flipping yourself into higher energy state, at getting done what needs to be, at working through it all, mainly those balls stay up in the air where they need to, and so hopefully at some point it WILL all ease off a little, and meanwhile you’ll finally be where you’ve been working so hard for long to get to!
Except –
No.
That’s not going to happen at all, is it? Because why the heck should you expect an outcome any different from MORE OF THE SAME when you just keep Groundhog day-ing TF outta your life by waking up each day and engaging in MORE OF THE SAME?!
Answer:
You should not.
Reality:
Unless you put your hand up and put a stop to the entire PARADIGM you’re operating in right now, you will CONTINUE to get more of the same,
forever,
and ever,
until you die,
Amen!
And sure –
You’ll get some good shit done.
Accomplish badass mofo shiz niz like nobody’s business!
You’ll be a winner baby, a star, and everyone will wonder how you managed it all!
And what you will think,
as you lay down and take your final breath,
and your eyelids close that one last time,
is
but I never did it, did I?
I never ACTUALLY did what I said I would.
I never actually went anything CLOSE to all in.
The truth is –
I didn’t even try.
I was busy.
I was accomplished.
I PUSHED.
And I managed to halfway convince myself that it was all working towards where I wanted to be, and that therefore I was on PATH, when the truth is, the truth ALWAYS was, the ONLY truth is that if I wanted to BE THE DAMN PERSON THEN I SHOULD HAVE JUST WOKE TF UP AND BEEN THE DAMN PERSON.
Wake up call:
>>> Being the damn person is something you go to NOW. You go there NOW. Advance straight to “Go”, collect $200 baby! You wanna GET there one day, you GO there, now, and you operate FROM there, forthwith, every day, forever more, THIS IS HOW IT WORKS AND IT IS THE ONLY WAY IT WORKS. <<<
So yeah –
Let’s TALK about your slight sadness.
Your boredom.
The continual fucking fatigue.
And the fact that you do NOT have a time management issue,
a sleep issue,
an issue of being too busy, trying to do too much,
or an issue of self care,
YOU HAVE AN ISSUE OF FAILING TO WAKE TF UP AND PRESS PLAY.
Err day.
The way you would be if you were there.
Err day.
The way you would be if you were there.
Err day.
The way you would be if you were THERE.
And here is what else:
I know that I know that I KNOW that I know that YOU are hiding your true power and magnetism and lit-up-ed-ness and, well, just the VIBE of you, like a mofo.
You’re presenting a watery semen version of your fire to the world.
It’s … disgusting.
Nobody wants to see that.
What, you think that some sort of tepid, greyscale, translucent, 20% (if that, ha!) version of what you came to show the world is somehow gonna add up over time to the peoples seeing you, feeling you, paying you, and more still than ALL of that, to you getting to go to bed each night and know you were being ALL of you?
I DON’T THINK SO!!
And neither do YOU.
THAT’S.
NOT.
HOW.
IT.
WORKS!
You wanna know where energy comes from?
MAGNETISM?
The all day every day of you being so damn turned on by you that you have superhuman abilities, access to knowledge and truth and creativity and power and INSTANTANEOUS switch flicking from the great beyond?
The ability to at any time flip WAY beyond the physical, and into the quantum, the ethereal, the river beneath the river, the OTHER place, where you create, and dance, and whirl, and twirl, and pull down, and receive, and where you NEVER even think of becoming the damn thing because you ARE the damn thing and everything ABOUT that thing is just coming through and from and all over you such that you AUTOMATICALLY have and see and create and receive it ALL?
THEN DO YOUR DAMN JOB BITCH.
The job of opening up to everything beyond this plane.
Putting yourself in the space of it.
AND LETTING THROUGH WHAT’S BEEN WAITING FOR YOU THE WHOLE TIME.
You can spend your life, if you like, performing on stage, if you like, performing a rehearsed and careful and whoops forgot a step so now I’m screwed little performance, if you like.
She’s been waiting in the wings the entire.flipping.time.
He’s been glaring at you for DECADES wondering when you’d let go, and let him freakin’ FLOW.
And all you had to do, ALL you had to do, is move aside and let that badass take over.
What, you think energy, vibe, the essence of you being fully you is something you WORK towards, manage, or figure out?
lololol.
LET YOURSELF OUT OF THE WINGS AND ONTO THE STAGE OF YOUR OWN LIFE.
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