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How To Feel Worthy

(don’t be scared to be the real you) – photo by sol_one

Clothes that don’t quite fit you, or are old, dated, out of shape. Stained, perhaps.

Crockery you’ve been carrying around since that share-house back in 1998. Wine and water glasses mis-matching. Bed-sheets that still serve their function but aren’t exactly gorgeous or luxurious.

Holidays taken in ‘nice’ locations, but never quite where you really dream of going. That would be indulgent. Unnecessary. Something for the future; for when you’ve earned it. Oh – and of course you do some work whilst away. It’s only smart to use a few hours of your day. It’s not a big deal; you just like to stay on top of things.

Tell me something, hmmm?

If you go out of your way to invest money, time and effort in your health and the way you strive to look, then why oh why aren’t you treating yourself like a valued person in other areas?

(when will you start valuing yourself?) – photo by sol_one

When did you last reward yourself for a job well done? I’m talking even taking a few hours off to celebrate, never mind buying yourself something pretty or just for fun.

Have you, in the past 2 years –

Bought yourself some real jewellery? Even something small?

Bought yourself some pretty new shoes or clothes just because, rather than because you absolutely needed them and couldn’t avoid buying them?

Set aside any percentage of your income just for yourself, for spending money? And then spent it? On stuff you just want – frivolous and fun stuff, not development stuff!

Bought yourself a really beautiful set of underwear?

I buy myself things. A lot of things, actually. I’m a regular spender in fact; probably should keep more of an eye on it!

I buy –

  • Coffees while I’m working on my writing
  • Courses to further my knowledge on nutrition, hormones or business
  • Books to further my knowledge on the same
  • A ton of stuff for my daughter, things she needs but also things that would be fun or just because
  • Organic food
  • Practitioner supplements
  • Memberships for training, kickboxing and yoga
  • Other health related stuff like metal testing, including flying to Sydney to do it
  • I even travel interstate or overseas at least once a year! I make sure it coincides with a course I can do, or a workshop I can run.

(i buy and do stuff that MATTERS. isn’t that what it’s about?) – photo by iwanbeijes

But jewellery? Pretty stuff? ‘Just because’ stuff?

Oh sure, I bought some earrings for $40 at Myer a couple of years ago. Actually, I even bought a handbag that day as I was doing a corporate presentation and realised I was going to arrive with a backpack! It was okay to spend that money – after all, I was about to make it from the presentation.

New clothes? What’s the point? I just wear gym gear all the time anyway. And if I lean out a bit more I’ll be able to fit back into my jeans from when I was 19! Besides, I like my well-worn diesels from 6 years ago. I’m happy I can fit into those ones. Why do I need new jeans?

And sure, most of my shoes are scuffed. Big deal. Wouldn’t it be a waste of money to buy new ones for that reason? Same thing applies re fixing the dings on my car. Or getting new sheets every so often! And spending money on house stuff in general … isn’t that what adults do? You know, real ones who are on top of everything in their lives?

your dream life will remain on hold until you decide you’re worth it

Yesterday I had a slap in the face when reading a simply brilliant book on manifestation and living the life you love.

It was the first time I’ve fully explored the idea that until you act and believe that you are worthy, you are not going to achieve the life you want. Think about it –

Why would you be given more (more meaning more of anything but also better results, the body or life you want) until you can first show that you believe you are worthy?

And –

When will you believe yourself worthy? When you’re perfect? When you tick off everything you ‘know’ you should be doing?

When exactly do you imagine that’s going to happen, hmmm?

what are you waiting for?

Look around you.

This girl wants to be leaner, or curvier or maybe even taller.

That one wants abs, a perkier butt, a wrinkle free face. Some of us want to once and for all get on top of our finances, or want to move into a dream home; have a dream holiday. Buy a brand new wardrobe, throw an amazing party.

But not now of course! Now, we’re all just … waiting.

Waiting to get the body, the bank balances, the recognition. The self-love, perhaps?

And we’ll do or achieve this stuff when we’re ready. When we’re truly deserving. We’ll get to it. Yes, that counts even for the ‘shaping up’ stuff. Do you think you’ll ever get ‘there’ if you don’t believe you’ve earned it?

what if you’re never truly ready?

What if it were possible – even possible – that you’re always going to have things you want to work on or better about yourself?

What if that were a good thing? And you could embrace, love and accept yourself just as you are, unconditional of anything and then choose to embrace the challenge of reaching for new goals?

What if, heaven forbid, you even stopped to reward yourself along the way for new achievements. To celebrate with a meal out or a pretty thing or even some kind words to yourself? It’s not about spending the money. You’re going to spend money anyway. Why not even a small part of that just for stuff you don’t need; don’t have to buy?

Imagine if you didn’t feel that each little or big achievement in your life was nothing more than a stepping stone to quickly move toward the next thing, and that that was the thing you simply have to do in order to be worthy. Enough. Desired, by yourself. Accepted by others. Except it’s never enough, is it?

Until you let it be.

What if you could live the life you plan to one day live now? Be the woman you want to be now?

how to be worthy

It’s not a race. There are no checkpoints you can pass. It’s not about winning; being the best.

(not this) – photo by rore_d

There is nothing – absolutely nothing – you can do, have, achieve or be that will make you worthy.

In the end, it’s going to come down to you. You, deciding that you are enough. That you deserve the best. And that you’re ready for more, now.

Can you do this?

Can you let go of the ridiculous standards you set for yourself every day and then re-set should you dare to ever actually achieve them?

Can you stop striving for the next thing and be happy – be enough – just being you? Exactly as you are. And enjoying the journey?

Can you? Or would you prefer to wait until you’ve earned that? I’m sure as heck going to stop waiting.

Why not join me?

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2 responses to “How To Feel Worthy”

  1. Thanks for the mention of my book gorgeous Kat!

    Great post and in my mind – these are questions that women can’t hear too much. It’s a daily habit to maintain, treating ourselves like VIPs!

    xx Denise

    • Kat says:

      Definitely. And thank you for the reminder of that … I think the days we don’t ‘feel’ like treating ourselves like VIPs or loving ourselves are the days we need to the most!