HOW TO KICK OUT A MEMBER OF YOUR PROGRAMS
I find that my online clan is so rock solid aligned and #soulmateclient perfect that it’s extraordinarily rare for me, these days (since I figured out how to call in my perfect peeps!) to have anyone not aligned end up in, so much so that when somebody creeps in who flat out should’t be there, I almost feel the need to interrogate them as to how they got in.
But being a sizeable personal brand company and all, it DOES still happen on occasion, and when it does, make no mistake:
I WILL defend my territory, and my true tribe.
Yesterday I unfortunately had to kick out a member of my High Vibe Mastermind.
She went on a bit of a commenting rampage over the last few days, making her opinions known in somewhat bizarre and strong ways, as well as flat out bullying other members in a few instances.
There are several issues here and I want to bring them up for discussion. I think it’s important to share my thought processes with you as I’m all about that FULL transparency, not just the fun stuff!
Dealing with conflict is something every online business owner will have to face at some point, so I’m here to share what I have learned in this area and also to be an example for you that it is ALWAYS okay to stand in your power and know your boundaries.
In this case:
1) Bullying another member is an instant red card.
No negotiation, and apologies – while expected and accepted – do not undo that. The woman in question did email me multiple times apologising for her behaviour. I’m not sure if she contacted the members she attacked. I appreciate the apology but it’s too late.
In this case I’ve had issues with this woman before. She went pretty next level crazy in a group Regan and I ran last year … we kicked her out after she made full on threats and just weird shit … including getting really really angry about my necklaces lol … she bent over backwards begging for forgiveness and we ended up giving it. It never sat well with me, as the shit she’d said was just SO full on, but I decided to give her a second chance, and she did then toe the line.
However, I’ve heard numerous reports of her going nuts in other programs and also bullying other members … truth is, no matter how much you might want to see the good in everyone (and I do) some people are just troublemakers.
Despite this, I let her stay when I saw she’d joined in High Vibe, and hoped maybe she’d calmed down since last I’d heard of her.
I was wrong.
2) Alignment.
And this is huge, obviously. It’s also why – aside from repeat offences – an apology for bad behaviour won’t cut it with me. I can forgive … AND I can say ‘thank you for demonstrating to me that you’re not a fit’. Because flat out, my soulmate clients (you!) would never treat someone else like that. No way. No how. No matter what.
She’s just not one of us.
3) Not one of us.
Kind of the same thing, but leading on. Even when she wasn’t bullying, she just wasn’t high vibe material. I know that sounds FUCKING EXTREME and elitist or just exclusionary to say, well, guess what? My programs – all of them, but ESPECIALLY my private client stuff and my ongoing membership, The High Vibe Mastermind, ARE exclusive places! For a certain type of person! For me and YOU type of people … assuming you are me as you read this. lol! And somebody who doesn’t fit the mold just freaking clutters up the place. They say weird shit that makes no sense … they don’t GET it … they distract from flow.
So boom, you’re out.
4) My priority after alignment in MY biz and life is alignment in yours.
I won’t have you or any of my true soulmate clients and members being made to feel that this is in any way not the place we both know it is!! I.e – completely badass but also completely like-minded and completely SAFE. So, there’s that.
This is what was sent to her:
“Hey XXXX, hope you’re well. Unfortunately we have had to cancel your High Vibe Mastermind including your access to the FB page. Based on the recent comments you’ve posted on the group page, the High Vibe Mastermind isn’t the right place for you right now. We’ve refunded your payment for the program as well. Best of luck! – Kat”
Now, as for refunds and handling follow ons:
Typically when people get kicked out of a group they lose their SHIT. I’ve not had to do it too many times, but trust me – people want to be the one telling you to get fucked, not the other way around, and there is a general perception out there that if I’m selling you something then I must want your money.
Well, actually, no. I want fucking alignment, first and foremost. As mentioned above. And I will put MY alignment, and the alignment and happiness of my #soulmatetribe ahead of money.
But as #highvibebadass Michelle Woolard Pippinwould say, only 100% of the time!!
Anyway, it tends to boggle people’s minds when you remove them and don’t essentially do whatever it takes to take or keep their money. lol.
That being said – there is no reason why I ‘should’ refund somebody who comes into my program, unleashes themselves lunatic-attack-style on other members, etc. However when I kick somebody out of something I ALWAYS refund them, even if they’ve already had all the content.
I don’t want their money / energy. Simple. It’s nice and clean.
As for follow-ups – if / when people email begging / threatening / attacking your necklaces / whatever … the response is simple.
“Thank you for writing me. My position stands as already outlined. I wish you all the best; goodbye”
If they keep writing I will write back and inform them that I and my team are no longer able to respond. And after that fully block / ignore. I will block them already, anyway, on Facebook, when the incident first occurs, so that communication would be only over email.
Why block? Why the fuck not? Energy / alignment!! Not to mention the amount of wasted time and energy which your team or self might end up losing on it. Plus, as I’ve very clearly said many times over: we’re building us a cult over here. It’s a cult of revolutionary fucking leaders who are the TRUE 1% within the 1% and who show up accordingly, IN ALL WAYS.
We have things we stand for in this community …
And things we don’t.
We will take you in and love and raise you as our own, and you’ll love and raise us in return.
But if you’re not a fit?
Then honey you’re not a fit. Move along. Plenty of other places to be! And if you got in here by accident, somehow, then simple:
We’ll show you the way out. Fucking FIRMLY, baby.
CAN I get an Amen?!!
I hope this helps you, if you ever find yourself in a situation where somebody who just isn’t RIGHT, is in your stuff.
I will add – you have full permission to move somebody out just because you don’t vibe with them. They don’t have to have done something really really bad in order to justify it. If it’s not a fit, it’s not a fucking fit – don’t do them OR you the injustice of pretending otherwise.
Cool?
So.
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I’d love to know your take on what I wrote above, as well. Give me an Amen or your thoughts below!!
DON’T FORGET –
Life is Now. Press Play.
Kat
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