When I am soul certain, and I know that I know what I know and I know that it is TRUE, that it will BE, that there is NOTHING, which can make it not for me,

what has happened in that area is not that I somehow graduated from being human,

bypassed fear and unworthiness, or cast them fully out, but instead, what did happen, and the only way I’ve ever known myself to allow the receiving of ANYTHING, and its consistent showing up,

is that I just snapped out of it.

I just went beyond my BS and into my true set point, the soul one.

I just decided to honour God truth.

I decided to be DONE.

And so when I am looking to a new area, cautiously peeling back a layer or two to look at what wonders (or terrors!) lie beneath, asking myself howwwwwwww on earth I am going to shift this damn thing, create this damn thing, know or BECOME this damn thing, finally CHOOSE this damn thing, I remind myself, quite simply, that actually?

I can just decide to be done.

I might nod my head a little,

tilt it to the side,

consider the validity of such audacity,

“have I finally reached the point of full.blown.fantasist and I LITERALLY just making shit up?”

mulling this and other truths around refusal to Do Proper Things, over for a moment, before ultimately-

nodding once more. Firmly this time. YES.

Yes I can just decide to be done.

Yes I absolutely am full blown fantasist and you are fucking welcome for the walking talking ever-creating and choosing demonstration of what is possible.

Because in the end,

it really is and always was and only could be this –

And then you just decided to be done.

And then you just dropped the bullshit.

And then you just EXHALED THE FEAR AND WORTH SHIT,

namafuckingste and don’t let the door hit you on the way out, but FINE, I guess you’ll be back and I’ll just SWING back when you do,

and meanwhile?

Imma just gonna snap into rich.

Hot.

LOOOOOVVVVVVEEEDDD.

Soul certain happy AF.

And free.

And why the heck wouldn’t you? Why wouldn’t it be NOW? Why would it possibly need to be true that you have to wait?

What, you really think the answer is to shed every possible layer first, detox and sort out all the reasons why NOT?

What if,

you just snapped to the bit where you realise why NOW?

and what if,

you did it fucking now?

You can keep playing a nice little game of ‘one day’ if you’d like.

Or you can sit up straight, boobs out, and decide that it’s THIS day.

And then?

SHE JUST DID.

Katrina Ruth

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Katrina Ruth

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