I love you so much, and the brilliant voice of your tortured artists soul takes my breath away, but frankly, and no I WON’T apologise at all, you’re being kind of an idiot about it.

I wish I could shake you, sometimes, shake you into knowing and also living by how powerful and how needed, is the voice of your soul.

But instead I will tell you, as I shake my head in wonder at all that is inside of you and the very small amount you’ve allowed out, in bits and pieces, a little drip or drop at a time here or there, as though it would somehow be DANGEROUS to let out more – (well, perhaps it would be, but how much MORE so, to keep it in?) –

I love you.
So much.
And the brilliant and magnetic voice of your tortured artists soul, it takes my breath away.

Have you thought about this of late? Have you thought of it EVER? The reason why you find this whole online game so HARD, really it’s more that it’s so ANNOYING, do I REALLY have to do that, is that how it must BE?

And you stamp your foot, or scowl, and grump off into a corner, perpetually that child not WANTING to do what they’re told, not wanting to be put under command, no, not me, I will do what I WANT!

As an adult, as an entrepreneur, as a marketer, you sigh at yourself, and you think –

I really need to get it together.

I need to grow UP.

I gotta get ORGANISED, and do shit properly for once! Enough with this messy and chaotic and all OVER the place thang I’ve got going on, where I continually seem to promise myself I will do the things –

The OH so very many things –

That a proper biz-niz person must do.

Has it occurred to you though, at ANY point along the way of trying to do all that shit, and do it ‘right’, that the problem may or may not be with the shit, but the problem is DEFINITELY with you, which is to say that there ain’t no problem at all (there never is!), but simply that of COURSE you don’t seem to be able to turn up like a good lil marketer, no matter how many promises you make, and break.

How could you?

You’re not a marketer, you’re an artist, a tortured one as we all are, and it’s time, finally, to own that.

Did you hear me? Doesn’t it feel like the BIGGEST breath of fresh air? Say it with me – !


I’m an ARTIST baby, so SUCK it.

And a tortured one at that, and I’m gonna OWN that shit!

Why would you want to own being a TORTURED soul?

Perhaps a badge of honour, or pride …

“The Tortured Artist”, it sounds rather grand. I could write a book with that title …! (I’m sure it’s already been done!)

Maybe that.

But maybe, actually, it’s about reminding yourself, reminding OURselves, that being a great artist is specifically and very much NOT about being all organised –

In a little box
In a little square
In a little corner
In a little place
Oh so pretty and shiny
On the internet

You walk around telling yourself a BULLSHIT STORY that in order to get to the next level things must be just right and just so and very neat and very orderly and one must BUILD oneself a tidy little tower of dots –

SO many dots, don’t you seem them all?!

– joining together, just so.


Not only will you NEVER make the money you THINK you want (ha! You’re SO not motivated by money; the money will come when you follow your ART bitch!), and you will NEVER get the following you want (ALSO not something which ACTUALLY motivates you, it’s the art, it’s the art, it’s the art, it’s the release, and ONLY that, for fucks SAKES) –

But money an’ fame an’ all things grand and glorious aside, isn’t it TRUE (Your Honour!) that it is ALREADY KILLING YOU?

So softly
So slowly
So insidiously
Twisting and worming itself into and all around your soul
And gradually – 
But OH so definitely – 
The very life out of it

And right up until that final MOMENT – !

When all of a sudden you realise it’s TOO LATE and FORGIVE ME FATHER, FOR I KNOW NOT WHAT I DID, and your eyes bulge out of your head, your throat chokes over for the final time, and you collapse, purple, to the floor, right up until that VERY moment – !

You’ve somehow still managed to convince yourself

That you’ll do your real work soon

That you’re getting there

That your DEEPEST soul cravings, and truth, and the real and raw and at times TERRIFYING in its greatness and also in its UGLINESS art, will have time, later, to come out

You bought into the God damn story, didn’t you?

If I do this first, and then that, do it like them, build the business first, I need strategy, yes that’s what I need, a little bit of STRATEGY, I need to think, and plan, and BE LIKE THE OTHER ENTREPRENEURS, and then I can be FREE!


If you want to be free you must choose freedom NOW.


But yet there you are –

Oh, it’s just another day is it, not saying yes to your soul, not pressing fucking play, not doing the God damn work which IS the very beat of your soul!

Just another day.

Just a shame your entire fucking LIFE is made up of THIS MOMENT RIGHT HERE.



And now look FORWARD

You are a product of what you already chose and what you are choosing in THIS moment right here is your FUTURE baby.

You’re slip slip slipping away from destiny

Every day, further out of alignment and off track

Soon enough, you won’t even be able to SEE where the original path lay


You’re either ALL in for your art or ALL the way the fuck out.


No, you don’t GET to keep one foot in, or one foot out.

In the end, it’s VERY black and white –

You’re either pressing the fuck play and BEING who you came here to be, ALL in, and FUCK internet MARKETING, because that is for THEM, not US, the way WE build an empire, get followed, get paid, get seen, is by ignoring ALL of it, and following what is IN us, and they can TRY ALL THEY LIKE TO FIGURE IT OUT AND UNDERSTAND HOW IT EVEN WORKS, and they will NEVER –

But never also will YOU, if you don’t fucking DO it – !

– and you either GET that, and are living and breathing and showing up from it because WHO THE FUCK SAID IT HAD TO BE LIKE THAT ANYWAY, WITH THE GOD DAMN RULES, I AM THE RULES, YOU ARE THE RULES, THERE ARE NO FUCKIGN RULES –

Or you don’t get it

And you’re telling yourself a bullshit lie that one day you’ll get it

Or do it

And become

All that’s in you

BUT you won’t

You’re lying

To yourself

And the snake, the rope, the STEEL-CLAD COIL around your soul which is oh so softly squeezing the LIFE out of you and you are LETTING it, well – !

You’re the one who PUT it there!

Showing the world, showing us, showing yourSELF, that who you ARE –

Is who you are being.

Who you ARE, is who you are BEING, not who you know you could or should be.

Just like them.
Just like them.
Just like the ones you DESPISE.

And I thought I was going to come on here today and speak of how much I LOVE you, and your beautiful and BRILLIANT artists soul, how I see the angst and the fury and the power and the DEEP sadness, and the desperate WANTING, for something meaningful, to create something meaningful, something to take their BREATH away, and I WILL, I WILL do all of that, well I’m saying it right now because FUCK –

You’re amazing.
You’re incredible.
You are GIFTED beyond measure, and what I see inside you, is, just –


I don’t even know how to respond to it.

I thought I was going to speak of all of that, I wanted to lift you up, I wanted to tell you that the ARTIST OF THE AGES IN ME SEES THE ARTIST OF ALL TIMES IN YOU, that my tortured and relentless artists soul sees YOURS, and says yes.

But instead here I am

Once again

Kicking your ass

And with it,

As always,

My own.


Don’t you SEE? Don’t you underSTAND? We are not SUPPOSED to do it like them!

We tear out our SOULS every day –

And put it on the internet –

And the fact that it’s ‘on the internet’ –

Can make us think that therefore there are Certain Things We Must Do in order to turn it somehow into a business, a brand, MO-ney.

But the true ARTISTS, the true PERFORMERS, the gifted and born for it revolutionaries, story-tellers, healers, the indigo as FUCK children who just SEE the world in a different way, who don’t see it at all actually, but instead FEEL it –


Or their pretty little system.


Those with the sort of power inside of them which lives inside of YOU have been captivating and compelling and CALLING THEIR AUDIENCE TO ARMS since the dawn of time.



In the end,

It’s very black and white.

You’re either doing what you came here to do, an artist whose soul work is being let FREE, ALL of it, and FUCK what ANYBODY has to say about it, and you are creating your LIFE by BACKING yourself –

Or you’re living a life of bullshit.

Just like them.

Which means that actually –

You are them.

You proved it.

You made it so.

So enjoy that last breath or two

And quit asking why it feels so contracted, why it’s so difficult to inhale fully, or even at all

You put the fucking rope around yourself

And now you’re pulling it tighter, day by day

Of course it’s fucking killing you

How the HELL did you expect expansion, freedom, abundance, and the FULL UNTAMED BARING OF YOUR SOUL –

When what you choose, every damn day, is prison

And death

So go along

With the other marketers

You’re SUCH a good girl

You did it right

You did it like them

Well DONE, your hair is just so!

And you fit in

Just like you always wanted …