Katrina Ruth photoshoot selfie with Mercedes Benz
Live Your Passion

YOU’RE STILL MAKING IT SO.DAMN.HARD

The way you don’t say thank you, for the tiny shifts, the little wins, the things you’ve begun to take for granted and forgotten are a piece of magic.

The way you’re on the other hand so surprised, when the big things work out and you keep looking over your shoulder for when someone is going to take it away from you, maybe it was given you by mistake, it must be an error, surely?!

And you forget to remind yourself that ‘of course’ this happened.

“Don’t you even know who I am?”

The way you repeatedly talk yourself into and then back out of going ALL in to pursue the TRUE level of being seen, known and heard which you know is meant for you, wildly shifting back and forth between a certain energy and one which plainly screams “I don’t believe in myself!” “I couldn’t have it that good!” “I shouldn’t even try!”

Not knowing that every time you flip back into I can’t, I shouldn’t, but how, you UNDO the deliverance of the things which were IMMEDIATELY on their way to you when you were in certainty and JUST WATCH ME.

You do know, right, that the very SECOND you move into certainty and JUST WATCH ME, the outcome, the shift, the next level is on its way to you?

It literally gets shipped the second you decide!

And down down down the magic invisible tunnel from up above it flows and flies, on a speeding path towards YOU, the target, locked in, certain!

It’s nearly there!
It’s coming SO quickly!
You wouldn’t BELIEVE how rapidly things will appear when you FULLY decide, and also surrender the how, the process, the outcome, too!

But then, all of a sudden –

You waver.
You backtrack.
You freak the fuck out like the girliest of girls testing the coldest of icy river waters with her toes.

“Aughhhhhhh! I can’t!”

Shriek, squeal, help, stop!

And instantly –

Away it is taken from you.

And you never know how close you were, how close you REPEATEDLY are, you just think –

“Oh, it’s so HARD, this manifesting shit, this success shit, this creating the life you want shit, this being the 1% within the 1% within the 1% in all AREAS shit!”

“I tried, but it’s just not that simple!”

No, it’s not that fucking hard actually.

And it is DEFINITELY not complex. Simple is exactly what success is.

Sure, it may hurt, stretch you, bring you to your knees over and over again to create the everything you desire in all areas of your life, but HARD?

Hard is fucking not pressing play on the life and YOU you are meant for, don’t give me ANY other description of HARD.

You’re not talking about hard.
You’re talking about a lil struggle.
A lil pain.
A lil never-ending push.
A lil giving your entire LIFE to do what it takes no matter what it takes UNTIL it takes, and THAT – 

Is not hard.

That’s living.

It’s easy to just be the person who does the damn thing, or all the damn things, and IS the damn thing, in all areas, every day, forever, Amen!

That’s easy.

Giving your LIFE for something, something that matters, is easy.

But you wouldn’t know that, would you, because you INSIST ON MAKING IT SO FUCKING HARD.

The way you ‘commit’ to change without any true understanding of what the word means.

“Oh, I’m committed!” 

“Yep, I’m all in!”

So what happened today then??

“Oh, today! You know – today. I couldn’t. I wouldn’t. I didn’t. Because …. blah blah blah”

Nahhhhhh –

I don’t think you know what commit means.

I don’t think you know what decide means.

I don’t think you know what I FUCKING WILL AND JUST WATCH ME means.

I don’t think you’ve ever experienced the ABSOLUTE freedom from ABSOLUTE discipline to the pathways, the actions, the emotions, the state of BEING required to automatically get you to your goals in every area, and as a result of that you STILL think success is hard.

As you continue to live your one foot in one foot out normal life

“I’m woke!”

“Just not right now, ’cause right now I’m tired”

And you fall fall fall back into the zombie world where in actual fact –

You are recognised.
You are seen.
You are accepted.
You are known.

Why?

BECAUSE YOU NEVER REALLY LEFT.

Clamber out a little bit, SAY you’re gonna do things and change things and be the thing, NOPE this does not mean you’re one of us.

You’re one of us when you’re one of us, it’s black and white, there is no grey area, we KNOW AND SEE AND SMELL AND SENSE you from across the room, we KNOW our own when we encounter them,

And oft before we do

But you?

We hear the words you say
We hear the way you frame it in the correct way
We hear the promises you make

And we continue to not be surprised at all when you once again flake out, and backtrack, because you either ARE this person, or you’re not.

And this is how you make it so.damn.hard, isn’t it?

You speak about being this person.
You think about being this person.
You journal about being this person.
You even post freakin’ memes and blogs and rants and stories about being this person.

But when push comes to shove, and often at the first enhanced spot of pain or uncertainty, you VERY CLEARLY SHOW YOU ARE NOT THIS PERSON.

There are so many ways you make it so damn hard still.

The way you don’t thank.
The way you don’t expect.
The way you still place those ‘ahead’ of you on a pedestal, and separate yourself from them, make it that they are magic or special or different, thus essentially claiming that YOU ARE NOT LIKE THEM,
Or alternately allowing yourself to be triggered, envious, judgement, “oh she this she that, she PAH”, therefore pushing away that sort of success from YOU, because how can you ever have,
Or be,
That which you mock,
Or deride?
The way you switch on and off from where you can or should
The way you still give in to the expectations and ideals of others
And on
And on

But the main way you make it hard, you wanna know?

You keep on buying into a bullshit fucking story that it’s hard.

And you fail to just be the person.

And I wonder, don’t you?

I wonder what would happen –

If you just stopped that shit?

No more excuses.
No more BS.
Just you,
Your naked soul and truth,
And the doing of the damn work

Til the day you die

As you have have have EVERYTHING

And you be be be ALL that you were born for

And you laugh laugh LAUGH uproariously,

That you ever thought it was hard

To have it all
Be it all
And change the fucking world

 

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