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I Just Realized I’m A Selfish Control Freak – But Maybe It’s A Good Thing?

I’ve been in Surfers Paradise for less than 24 hours and I’m already wondering what in God’s good name I’m doing here.

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I have been here before so I’ve only got myself to blame, but good grief. This. Place. Is. Horrible. I’d forgotten. Or maybe last time I came here I was young enough to find it all fun and frivolous.

The tourists with their tacky theme park t-shirts. The masses of brightly-colored polyester-filled retail stores. Greasy diner after greasy diner, with Starbucks serving as the only familiar beacon of hope amongst every other over-packed carb and sugar filled cafe. The fact that it’s sweaty humid despite the rain. And the (definitely my fault) crunchy sunburn covering my back, stiffening me up, and causing my mood to drop at least 50% points every time I twist or turn.

I feel disgusting. Feral, in fact. As though I’ve somehow gained 2 dress sizes since I left Melbourne yesterday morning. I also feel kind of dirty on the inside. And I didn’t even really eat anything I normally wouldn’t.

But I have missed my regular exercise, and I can really feel the difference. In fact, I’m pretty much sure that this is a major factor in my grumpiness. Not sure if that’s a good thing – I guess I should be able to go one day without working out! Truth is, I actually did exercise yesterday. We spent the day in Byron Bay after a ridiculously early departure from Melbourne. Byron was fantastic.

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The weather was perfect (apparently more so than we realized, given the aforementioned sunburn), we avoided the main strip, and yet still managed to enjoy some great coffee and quality food. We’d parked our car at the ‘non-main’ end of town in order to avoid the tourist traffic, and as a result ended up traipsing up and down the beach four times. I guess it took around 25 minutes each time, except for the one occasion when we detoured through the rain-forest. Very nice.

After we left Byron we stopped at Fitness First Mermaid Waters (undeservedly a Platinum club) for a quick weights session. Here’s a tip: crunchy sunburn chin-ups – not so fun. But overall, a good day. I felt great. Relaxed and energized despite less than 2 hours sleep the previous night.

So how is it that I can feel so absolutely foul less than 24 hours later?

If I’m completely honest, it comes back to one very important thing. Control. I don’t feel that I have it right now. I wanted to start the day with a workout and didn’t (boyfriend was desperate to hit the breaky buffet before it finished and I hadn’t hopped out of bed early enough to account for that). When I decided to do a quick run in the apartment gym I couldn’t (basement car park gym with petrol fumes a-plenty and no tready anyway). I then made a not-so-smart choice of ‘getting value for my money’ at the breakfast buffet and ate 3 mini-muffins on top of my 3-egg omelette, baked beans, bacon, and processed juice. In case that weren’t already enough to leave me feeling full and guilty I went back to the room, sat on the couch and ate chocolate while watching bad TV.

It was 10.30am and I had a week of this ahead of me. Fantastic.

If you think I’m whinging, thank your lucky stars that you’re not here with me – I just gave you the edited version. And I know, I know, I shouldn’t be working – as in writing this – while on holidays. Nor should I be guilt-tripping myself over a big breaky with no exercise beforehand.

Or should I?

Because the truth is that having just sat down and thrown up this little rant onto the computer (thanks Alisa Bowman), I feel a million or so percent better. I love writing once I’m in the zone, and I definitely needed to get that stuff off my chest. Blurting it out to you is a hell of a lot cheaper and more effective than therapy, and I get a blog post out of it to boot.

As far as the eating and non-training side of things – as much as people continue to tell me I should just ‘relax’ on holiday, I just can’t quite agree. Relax to me does not mean destroy my energy, my waistline, and ultimately my sense of pride in my health. Sure, this can mean I’m doing some scheduling whilst on vacation, I’m avoiding some group activities so I can trek up to Burleigh Heads Bikram tonight, and I’m no doubt going  to be repeatedly saying no to take-away pizza. But at the end of the day, it’s my holiday and I’ll be a selfish control freak if I want to.

So with that in mind –

What to do, what to do, about my trapped in a nightmare tourist town situation? I’ve considered jumping a plane home and having a holiday at home. Still thinking about it, in fact. We’re here with a bunch of people so it’s not as though I’d be running off on a romantic holiday for two. Still wouldn’t go down too well, me thinks. We do have a rental car and are planning an escape to Noosa at some point (no McDs, KFC, tacky strip clubs – awesome), but in the meantime I guess I’m going to have to suck it up. And I’m definitely going to have to do something about it. Because the control freak in me just isn’t going to put up with a week of progressive health & fitness decline or tourist activities that I really don’t want to be doing. And I’m selfish enough to be upfront about that –

Watch this space. And hey, thanks for listening.

Don’t forget –

Life is Now. Press Play.

Kat x

P.S.

Rebel.
Upstart.
Fuck the system; screw the rules.
Won’t do what they told me.
Too much.
Unreasonable.
Ridiculous.
Unprofessional.
Crazy!

Should I go on? I could, but I think you get the picture.

You’re the one who is not only not like the other PEOPLE, you’re also not like the other entrepreneurs.

They, they actually think they’re different; non-conformists?! Don’t make me laugh. You and I both see it as it is:

They just wanna be told how to build a pretty little website and a pretty little social media page or three and a pretty little online product or course and get their pretty little headshots and do a pretty little pre-scripted dance all over the internet so that other equally pretty fucking bland and boring and same same-y peoples pay them money,

And they can all sit in a pretty little womans circle together patting each other linking elbows and stroking each others hair and singing Kumbaya as the sun sets over another day of sinking ever deeper into the unremarkableness that is their lives.

They are the ones who are not only willing to jump through hoops, they also want to build more hoops for other people; they want to perpetuate the hoop jumping life and their whole sales pitch is basically some version of “I will help you to have a better and shinier hoop, come see!”

lolol

BUT REALLY.

Meanwhile, you –

You’ve tried the hoop-jumping life, maybe more than what you care to admit. And, whilst you’ve nothing against sitting around with other ladeez and stroking each others hair, you and your girls; the real ones?

You don’t exactly fit in in the typical woman’s circle.

You don’t feel at home with the pretty-preneurs, not even on the internet let alone in real life.

You don’t actually GIVE a fuck about having all your shit perfect,

Polished,

And just so –

And the idea of having sales and marketing and content processes which you have to systematically pre-plan and then work through and endlessly join dots with?

Makes you want to hurl.

Sure –

You’ve bought in at times to do the idea that maybe you DO gotta do it as they say.

An automated webinar, perhaps?? Facebook ads which carefully and smartly tell the world who you are and how you can help? A sales plan proven and tested by the greats. The gradual sinking slow decline of your soul, your joy, your dreams, and even your pussy as everything within you that once knew she could HAVE IT ALL AND DO LIFE HER WAY SLOWLY DRIES,

WITHERS TO NOTHING,

AND DIES?

Sure –

Why not

And look.

It’s not that any of these things are bad or wrong. Maybe right now you’ve got to a certain point by playing by the rules … kind of. Following what ‘logic’ suggests you do. Breaking free here and there with wild little jaunts into over the top madness, noticing how THAT lights you up and also how people respond to it … but ultimately continuing to go back to trying to find the right fucking system to get you to where you want to go,

Because this thing of trying to just be you interspersed with trying to get it all right and make it work, well –

It’s God damn tiring –

But also, in the end, if we’re going to be black and white about it, it hasn’t got you to where you want to be!!

You KNOW you should be making SO much more money.

NOW.

With consistency, and yeah, while of course of COURSE you’re down for doing the work, you also feel like it SHOULD be a lot easier, more flow

And you know that you know that you know that you’ve still not let out the most unrestrained and fully expressed side of you!

– The you they can’t look away from
– The you they are MAGNETIZED by
– The you who automatically commands a huge freakin’ following, and sales to match it

You know who I’m talking about –

THE MILLIONAIRE REBEL YOU!

Starting January 18th!

>>> https://thekatrinaruthshow.com/rebelmillionaire/

The revolutionary fucking leader who tears SHREDS off of normal every damn day before the rest of the world has barely sipped its coffee!

Who is FULLY unleashed in what she says, how she shows up, how she does business, how she does life.

Who does not give a fuck about following rules! Or sales systems! Or strategies! Who can and will do what works for HER, and if it happens to resemble other ways people build an audience and make a fuckload of money online, cool, and if not, so what! That is not the point! The point is –

She knows what works for her.
She backs herself unapologetically.
She DOES it.

And she gets the damn results. The BIG results. The CONSISTENT results. The FUCK yes results, not just with money but with the VIBERY of it all.

Imagine …

Waking up every day and KNOWING you have crushed the day before it already begun because THAT IS WHO YOU ARE AND HOW YOU ROLL!

* Your shit sells (at any and all price point)
* Your creativity and inner ideas machine flows endlessly (you always know what to put out into the world and that when you speak people PAUSE EVERYTHING AND LISTEN, whether it is with free content and shenaniganery or with your paid stuff)
* You don’t even have to think about low end or high end or how to take people through a value ladder or some such bullshit, the value ladder is YOU CONTINUING TO BE YOU, and the more that you DO you the more people just take themselves through whatever it is you’re offering!
* It is easy, natural, fun, and OBVIOUS how to build your automated income, funnels, the ‘cash machine’ side of your business.
* In fact the whole damn thing feels fun and easy and like you’re just being you (the full on you, the too much you, the rebel you, the fuck all of ’em THIS IS WHAT I STAND FOR AND NOW I’M GONNA TELL YOU you!),
* and at the same time you have the DEEPLY grounded and certain knowledge that the way you’re doing it, hot mess and chaos vibes and all, is WORKING. PS – the reason you feel certain of this is because your bank balance and soulmate audience and their feedback reflects it, not bc your spirit guides told you it’s coming

All of this is ALREADY available to you.

It is who you are and what you were born for.

You did not come here for normal!

You are one of the truly crazy ones, who has something inside of her that will leave the world BREATHLESS –
and allow her to make millions and impact millions –

BUT NOT IF SHE CONTINUES TO DO BUSINESS AND LIFE BY TRYING TO SOMEHOW BE A NON-CONFORMIST WHO CONTINUALLY CAVES AND CONFORMS.

For this to work,

REALLY work, like next next NEXT level $ and life flow work,
you’re going to need to FULLY turn your back on the idea that your breakthrough is waiting on the other side of you adjusting, filtering, compromising, playing the game the way the other entrepreneurs are playing it, or worrying about what the fuck your social media looks like!

What you’re going to need to do is simple:

FLICK THE DAMN REBEL MILLIONAIRE SWITCH BABY.

>>> https://thekatrinaruthshow.com/rebelmillionaire/

All in on madness.
All in on crazy.
All in on chaos.
All in on the TRUE epic awesome ridiculousness and too much-ness of YOU.

REBEL MILLIONAIRE

Starting January 18th!

For those who were born to run the damn thing,

To turn the world on its head and dance on top of it,

And who are ready to do just that.

>>> https://thekatrinaruthshow.com/rebelmillionaire/