You Can Do It On Your Terms

"live your dreams"You don’t have to follow the rules. I hope you know that?

This means, perhaps, stepping away from the obvious ‘have-tos’ of a supposedly successful life.

Like having a ‘great job’ with a great title and great income.

Like buying a house in the right suburb.

(Or at all).

Like getting the house stuff done before you have your time.

Like being a stay-at-home-Mum, or being a working Mum. Whichever it is you think you should be.

Like ‘being realistic’ at all at all at ALL!

But you also don’t have to follow the less obvious rules.

Let’s say, you believe in dreams. You believe, in fact you know wholeheartedly, that you create your reality. You believe in miracles darn-it, and you’re willing to do what it takes to make them happen.

You’re willing to throw everything you have at creating your dream business.

You’re willing to put your art out there despite the fears.

You’re willing to chase a crazy body goal even though everyone thinks you’re just obsessed and maybe they worry about you a bit.

You’re willing to step outside the norm.

And you’re determined to create your dream life.

If this is you, I’m so in love with you right now. I’m so excited for you. I believe in you too! Yes – I believe in miracles for ALL of us and I’m so proud of you for being willing to step up, take responsability, and make your dreams come true.


I just want to remind you of one thing.

When it comes to life, you can do it on your terms. (In fact you already ARE doing it on your terms, so I hope you’re doing so consciously and deliberately).

But more than that.

When it comes even to living your dream life, you can do it on your terms.

Let me give you a personal example.

My dream, for as far back as I can remember, has been to become an author. A published author. A best-selling author. And to make a full-time living doing so.

For years I believed that fulfilling that dream meant being accepted by a publishing house. Published in bookstores.

At some point, the book industry started to change and I realised my dream could change. It was exciting to realise not only that I could self-publish but in fact that it was fast becoming the smartest thing to do as an author.

So, I did it. I wrote a book. I published it. I paid attention to how to be smart about choosing my categories and initial marketing.

And I became a freaking best-selling author in 1 day! I made it to #2 on the Amazon Top 100, and reached a ranking of under 3,000 out of 1.6 MILLION paid books on Kindle.

"beat binge eating"

Un-freaking-believable! And so exciting.

The biggest part of my dream had come true. Full-time author income to follow 😉

Right away, I set to work on my next book.

Hey – I didn’t dream of being a one-hit wonder 🙂

I came up with a great topic idea. Broke it down into key areas. Created chapter titles. Worked out the sub-topics and action points for each chapter. And set to work writing. As a writer should do. As an author who wants to live her dream should do. Right?

Turns out, no.

The past few weeks I’ve manfully battled through my morning writing time. Filling in the gaps between sub-points. Getting the book created. It’s probably more than okay. There’s great content in there and I know it will help people.



To explain, I have to tell you about my real dream of being a writer.

I get up. I have the mornings to myself. I read something inspiring, moving, something that fills my mind with a need to – expand.

I journal. Purge my mind. Figure my stuff out. Get further inspired.

And then –

I write.

But the way I write, the way I really live my dream on my terms, is to write like I am right now.

Inspired in the moment.

Almost like a calling.

Completely unplanned. As though I am just the vessel getting a universal message out there.

I can’t draft this stuff.

I can’t mind-map it.

I can’t break it down into neat little sections and then join the gaps. Yes, I can create ‘a work’ from doing so. But it’s stale. There is no life in it. And worst of all – I don’t enjoy doing it. I feel pushed. I’m not in flow, not in alignment.

Whereas now –

I am writing without thinking. I have no idea what I’m going to say next. All I came up with was a concept; a title. The rest just needs to be said, so I’m saying it.


You can’t be a best-selling author by just writing random thoughts each morning. So I said to myself, even as it felt so WRONG to say it –

“Kat, that’s just what you need to do to write books. Research a good topic. Break it down. Get some structure in your writing for once woman! It’s all very well to write blog posts off the cuff and from the heart, but that’s not how you write books”

And then I read this. Which I have read before but had forgotten. And reading it again reminded me –

I can give myself permission to live MY dream MY way.

I’m ALL about creating my reality, and living my dream life. Heck, I run a whole online bootcamp on living your dream life. It’s what my coaching practice is built on. I’m damn good at helping my clients to make their dreams come true on their terms.

I just wasn’t quite letting myself do it.

And when I realised this, it suddenly hit me –

Why can’t I write a book my way? My best BEST work, the work that gives me goosebumps and that I KNOW can touch and heal those who read it, is the work that just flows out of me. 

My ‘planned’ writing is okay. Not saying it isn’t. I know I write well.

But I want to write stuff that freaking moves people. I want you to read it and then to want to rush out the door and completely change your life into the life you’ve always longed for. The life, perhaps, that you never even knew you always wanted.

I want you to cry.

I want you to be so damn inspired that you feel like you’re going to burst, that you suddenly just HAVE to take action.

And that. That just doesn’t happen when I structure my writing.


The message here.

The thing that needed to be said this morning, that I did not plan or know about or draft out and that I will not know really even edit as I just need to put it OUT there to you.

Yes, you can live your dream life.

But more than that.

You can do so your way. There is no ‘one right path’ to your perfect day, your perfect business, your perfect home or relationship or body.

Maybe you don’t have to write a business plan first. Or be ready. Or even know where you’re going to end up. Maybe you can just believe, and start.

Maybe you don’t have to work 80 hours a week to be the success you want to be.

Or 40.

Or even 20.

Maybe you don’t have to go to the gym every single day to have your dream body.

Maybe you don’t have to wait until the time is right to take that trip.

Maybe, just maybe, you don’t have to wait until the time is right to live your dreams.

Today, I’m not doing what I could or should be doing which is to write according to my book strategy. Instead, I’m doing what I want to be doing. This. What will you do today instead of your shoulds or coulds?

What dream will you follow?

You can live life completely and 100% and in every little or big way on YOUR terms. I hope you know that?

More than that though.

I hope you’re willing to try it.