2 Tough Questions Truly Successful People Are Great at Answering
It’s a well accepted truth that success begins and ends in your mind. I know I’ve said that myself several times, but actually I think it begins deeper than your mind. True success and living life on your terms actually begins in your emotions. If you don’t bring emotion and feeling into what you are creating, there’s a very good chance that you are thinking too much from the head and therefore not fully in tune with what would actually make you happy and fulfilled. When you leave the heart out of your goals, you find yourself aiming for things that you think will make you happier or that you assume you need, without questioning whether or not they are actually right for YOU.
You’re more likely, for example, to work hard on something for income purposes even though perhaps it’s not the true work you are called to do.
Of course if you were to make all your decisions based on how you feel, you’d be a pretty erratic person with little or no follow-through! Your greatest success will find you when you combine the power of your mind with your emotions and true desires.
The best way to do this, is to become practiced at listening in to that inner voice, at understanding what you truly believe and feel; deep within you. I don’t mean that you should respond to short-term ups and downs in your feelings, as these are often simple reactions to perceived stress or happenings on a day to day basis. What I do mean, is that you need to be tuned in to what you really feel and think and desire, underneath it all.
When you start to ask yourself the below questions even on a once a week basis (such as journaling about them) you are tending to the ‘Emotional You’, and giving it space to breathe. What I actually suggest is that you take care of the emotional side of you daily, not weekly! This could be by regularly writing or thinking about what you truly desire, what is important to you, or by speaking about it with a coach or learning more about it in a program. What you will find is that you can create a habit whereby it’s automatic for you to listen in to this side of yourself, the same as it becomes automatic to remember to shower each day!
Here are some questions to get you started –
1. What do you really desire?
You can answer this based on what you desire right now, in this moment, but after that choose to go a little deeper. What do you truly desire from your life, what is the ‘big picture’ for you? Answer with depth. For example, if you desire to be a debt-free millionaire and own a fabulous house and car, what are the underlying feelings or desires that achieving those things would create for you.
Remember – it’s never about ‘the thing’, it’s always about what the thing will do for you; what it will make you feel.
A simple exercise you can do is to list out all your current goals, and then ask yourself what that goal is actually about; what achieving it would make you feel. There you have your true goal.
2. The next question or pondering is to do with alignment.
When you are in alignment you feel happy, confident, and content with how your life is playing out. The great news is that by tuning in to the underlying desires of your goals you have the perfect recipe for creating alignment in your life. Have a look at the desires you’ve listed out or thought about relevant to your goals, and then ask yourself –
Am I creating these things in my life right now, or not?
It’s a simple yes or no answer.
What you might find is that when you start to aim your intent towards achieving your desired feelings the goals you thought you needed to hit will change a little, or even a lot!
This is because you are starting to think about success based on your values, and being true to you, rather than based on what you assume will provide you happiness.
Your values are the underlying ‘rules’ that you desire to live by, whether or not you realise it. Most people don’t really understand the concept of values, and even if they do they don’t adhere to living by their values. They simply rush through day after day without making time to do so.
An easy way for you to live in alignment with your values is simply to take regular – ideally daily – time to write and think about these deeper rules, and whether your planned day is going to allow you to meet them. Here are some questions you can use to do that –
What is important to me today?
What is truly and deeply important to me today?
Why does that matter?
If I could do one thing today, and only one thing, what would be the greatest success – what would allow me to go to bed at night feeling happy and proud of my day?
What do I just really NEED right now, even though it goes against the idea of what I ‘should’ do?
Is there anything that feels ‘off’ about today or this week? What do I need to change?
I urge you to pull out your journal now, or to open a new file on your computer now, and give yourself the gift of actually answering these questions properly. It is such a blessing to take that time for yourself, to look within and see what you really need. To listen. And then, of course, to go out and do.
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