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Day 6 Of My Fitness Model-Shoot Diet – My Thoughts

"clean eating plan"I admit it, I have not been as strict as I would have liked.

Mainly meaning I’ve had a couple glasses wine as well as slipped into my favourite old pattern of eating extra that I don’t need after dinner. A few blueberries, a little too much almond butter … and on one occasion I even ate 1/2 a gluten free brownie. OMG right?

Yep, that’s right, I’m not a perfect paragon of clean eating or robotic willpower.

In fact, even though I eat clean 95% of the time anyway, I seem to constantly have this need to put food in my stomach, especially when I’m in ‘relax’ mode. So it’s been very very tough to try and break the grazing-before-and-after-dinner habit that is fine for maintenance (given it’s all healthy anyway) but not so fine for wanting to get photo-shoot ready.

And I think that much of this is because there’s this part of me that inherently resists being strict with my food I think; too strict.

It’s a fear going back to the days of bulimia, of getting lean for fitness competitions and sports modelling competitions by eating nothing but chicken and broccoli in public and then going home and binging on donuts and chocolate and artificially-sweetened lollies by the kilo. Which was a HUGE recipe for digestive disaster; that last one. Ugh, my stomach is cramping just thinking about it.

I’d lie on my single bed in my parents house and drink maybe 3 or 4 low-cal hot chocolates each afternoon … all full of crap but at least sugar and fat free, which was all I cared about at the time.

I was desperate to rebel against the diet I’d been given,

not because I was hungry so much as that I believed I couldn’t do it;

that I couldn’t be that girl.

And even though I did get up on stage and I got into national magazines and even won one of my comps and placed 6th out of a HUGE line up for the national title of ‘Miss Bikini’ … it never felt like a well-earned achievement. I can’t sit here today, 10 years later, and say I’m proud of my competing days; not of any of it really.

I guess I’m impressed by what I put into it in terms of the training commitment and even the day-to day eating despite the binges … but proud?

No. Emotionally, it destroyed me and it took pretty much a decade to figure out how to move past that. But I don’t blame the competing or the diet, it was something that was within me already and stems from long-ago-set-beliefs about myself.

The truth now is that the reality of what that time in my life meant for me has stopped me ever since from setting a truly big physical goal.

Which is why when I posted on Facebook that I’m terrified of not only setting but also admitting to this photo shoot, I really meant terrified. Like, with every part of my being.

I’m scared that I won’t have what it takes.

I’m scared that maybe I can’t follow through and stick to a (healthy) diet plan to get me in my best shape ever and turn up both looking and FEELING amazing on the day.

I’m scared that I’ll feel the seduction of binge eating or even bulimia calling me again.

binge eating – do we ever really move on?

If you’ve ever been a binge or emotional eater and gotten over it, you’ll know that you never actually forget it. Every time you overeat or over indulge or stress really hits you, even as you almost automatically stay on track with the new and healthier you, as you manage your stress with journalling or by focusing on the outcome you want, there is this part of you that whispers –

“Wouldn’t it be easier to just eat?”

“You know you want to”

“Who are you kidding anyway? You’re going to give in sooner or later.”

"binge eating"

And you know what? Let’s say I did give in and binge, or let’s say you do even after days or weeks or YEARS of having a great relationship with food –

Would it be the end of the world?

No, right?

Except, to top it all off, for me at least and I’m sure you can relate –

I’m scared that if I did give in that it would all be downhill from there in a matter of days. That I wouldn’t be able to find my way out again.

Truthfully, when I think about it now as I write, what I’m scared of is that there is inherently something wrong with me; something about me that makes me prone to this and therefore I believe that if I put too much pressure on myself; if I say ‘I can’t’, or ‘I shouldn’t’ or ‘I won’t’, then I will set myself up for unavoidable failure.

And it’s pretty huge for me to admit this to myself, let alone to you.

On a logical level I know I am fine now, I know that I’ve moved on and rid myself of so many old beliefs and created a life where I do feel free to eat and be who I choose. Learning how to do all that, learning how to free myself from food bondage and having been able to successfully replicate those results with clients is pretty much the reason I’m running my workshop next week. So that I can continue helping women to break free.

But yes, that’s not to say I never have ‘those’ thoughts.

so why set such a goal then?

I know that some people may read this and wonder why, then, I’m setting this goal for myself; why I am risking my mental healthy basically. Especially as I am already a very clean eater, I do (now) have a pretty good relationship with food and my body, and it’s not as though I’m out of shape anyway.

Why not be happy being me, just as I am?

Why go to extremes?

If you’re reading this and you’re similar to me in that you are the girl in good or even great shape, the fit chick who people admire for her discipline to training and eating well, then I think you know my why already.

For me it’s wanting to finally achieve that sense of incredible pride that I never could find 10 years ago.

It’s wanting to prove to myself that I CAN be one of those girls who sets a physical goal and then does what it takes to meet that goal without having to have an emotional meltdown about it. Who just makes a choice, sets a smart plan, and follows through.

It’s wanting to really put my foot to the pedal of my life and see what I can achieve, see what I’m capable of. And that’s true in so many areas of course – it’s not as though this is my only big goal!

It’s wanting to have the courage and guts to finally do something I’ve said I’ve always wanted to do. To not be someone that lets another 5 or 10 years pass by and says “I wish I had have done that; I wish I had have really given it my all”.

It’s the need to prove to myself that I am good enough. I don’t mean good enough to get lean, as if you place your self-worth on the attainment of any goal then you only set yourself up for disappointment. What I mean is to prove to myself that I am good enough and worthy just BECAUSE.

And that therefore, because I am good enough, because I am worthy just for being me, I can, in fact, do whatever I set out to do.

And I can do it simply because I’m capable, and regardless of my past and regardless of the beliefs or self-sabotage that has previously held me back.

"emotional eating"

So maybe it never was – or is – really about ‘having to be strict’, about having to fight against myself and ‘stay strong’.

Perhaps what it’s really about is, what it’s always been about, is self-belief.

What do you think? Comment below.

And for me? Well – let the games begin (again).

Life is Now. Press Play.

PS

MONETIZE THAT SHIT NO MATTER WHAT

{AND DO WHAT YOU WANT ALL DAY}

A One-Time Live Online Workshop with Katrina Ruth, on How to Make Money Anywhere, Anytime, With ZERO Dependance on Any One Platform, Program or Tool … Aka JUST BECAUSE THAT’S WHO YOU ARE … AND – With the Greatest of Ease

Okay. Imma gonna get straight up on your ass about what needs to be said here, because obviously SOMEBODY needs to hit the damn truth button on this shit!!

Straight up from the gate up, you do NOT make money because of Facebook.

Because of Instagram.

Because of email.

Because of ANY of this shit.

You make money because of who you are and what you decide and make NON-NEGOTIABLE, period, The End!

As you may be aware, in the last day or so Facebook and Instagram went down down down OH so far down.

After a few obligatory ‘stop the world!’ messages to my team and friends (which resulted in a serious convo with one of my soul sisters as to whether we’d now have to become porn stars instead), I got back to business.

The business of posting and selling shit on Facebook, which is admittedly a big part of what I do each day???

Nah … the business of being ME, because THAT is what I actually do each day, and also?

It’s what gets me paid.

Funnily enough, as is often the way with these things, just yesterday somebody was making smart-ass comments to me about how all the coaches would survive if there was no Facebook or Instagram.

“How would they survive?”, I asked myself.

“Well, I have no idea how THEY would survive but I sure as shit know how I would survive:

Very fucking well indeed, thank you very much, because that is who I AM”

Word to the wise:

A) I was making serious money long before I used Facebook for it.

Allow me to say it again for those in the back: YOU MAKE MONEY BECAUSE OF WHO YOU ARE AND THE LEVEL YOU VIBRATE AT.

Vibrate?

It’s an energy thang baby, a frequency shiz niz, it’s just who you ARE and how life works for you.

Handy hint —> the level of wealth you enjoy or moan over now is already just a direct reflection of your frequency, and expectations. It ain’t got jack shit to do with what you do, and it certainly is not a product of which tools are available to you.

It is a product of YOU.

When the socials went down today it was FASCINATING to me to observe the response that came through in the in-between-y bits when people managed to post something.

People worrying about how it would impact their business, or feeling in some way handcuffed.

This is crazy! It’s fear-mongering at its worst and it’s an absolute SHITTY mentality as far as belief systems around where results come from.

Do you know what I felt, when I realised we couldn’t use Facebook as normal for our biz stuff?

EXCITEMENT.

It took a minute to click in, but I found myself getting all wriggly and lit up with excitement.

I love a damn challenge 🙂

And since I also choose to believe that everything is happening FOR me, I also took personal responsibility for this occurrence.

Obviously FB and Insta had gone down in order to force me to finally pull my finger out and learn how to go live on YouTube.

But mainly – hell YEAH to the opportunity to get creative!

Probably taking the whole thing a little bit too far, as I worked my way through some sprints on the rower post HIIT weights session, I started to imagine what would happen if Facebook was TRULY GONE AND NO LONGER OF THIS WORLD.

I got MORE excited with each second that passed (which makes me remember how damn BORED I get as soon as I know how to easily do something aka make money all day err day on Facebook), and I also found myself AUTOMATICALLY GOING INTO ZAG MODE.

Zag?

You know, like ‘When They Zig you Zag’. A classic, if ever there was one!! Thank you Dad, for always having all the BEST books on your bookshelf for me to start reading from 10 or 11 years of age!

See, I have a belief system which works rather well for me and I guess is just part of who I am –

I believe that things ALWAYS work out perfectly for me, and are always done FOR me …

I believe I am always on path …

I believe I always make the right decision, so therefore I never have to beat myself up, I just wait for the lesson –

AND

(drumroll)

I believe that my outcomes are predicated only by my choices, and that there is nothing I EVER need in order to get or maintain or ONLY improve on an existing outcome.

It’s this mindset that causes me to wonder what TF it has to do with anything when people say things like they can’t be in shape ’cause they have kids or just had a kids … or ’cause they can’t get to the gym (for example)

And it’s also this mindset that causes me to KNOW that the money I make and the impact my soul work has in the world has NOTHING to do with what tools or platforms are available to me or working.

I programmed myself a long time ago to IMMEDIATELY swerve if something was no longer serving me or working for me. It’s this part of my mind which therefore right away started coming up with creative and imaginative solutions for how business would OF COURSE carry on (and improve!) with or without social media.

And it’s also this part of my mind which of course right away finds a way to monetize the damn thing and turn it into epic and highly helpful content for you, aka this workshop!

It’s just how I think, and who I am. I am simply unavailable for NOT moving forward, and nothing will ever ever EVER make me believe that I have to depend on anything outside of me for my results.

So why a whole damn workshop on the concept?

Well, it’s more than that, isn’t it?

It’s a mindset of believing that you always get what you want.

It’s a mindset of believing that everything always works out for you.

It’s a mindset of believing that NOTHING can stop you.

That everything is working in your favour.

And?

That you can monetize ANYTHING, any time you choose, and with no ‘requirements’ in order to do so!

I don’t have to tell you that obvs the outcomes you get directly follow and reflect your mindset and your beliefs!!

Here is what else, as well:

This is not just about making money any time, from any thing, and knowing that even with challenge or things going wrong you only THRIVE and EXPAND!!

For me this goes hand in hand with duh – I get to do all of that on my terms.

By having FUN, and being in FLOW, and with ease.

In fact, the more money the more ease!! #justhowitis

That I can literally click my fingers and money shows up for me, meanwhile I’m just over here doing ma thang.

Speaking of which –

I think it’s about time I shared exactly what I currently DO all day, yeah? And how I do it / fit it all in / honour ALL the areas, PLUS manage to spend so much time sitting on my ass doing sweet FA!

In other words … !

Let’s hang out together this weekend!!

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MONETIZE THAT SHIT NO MATTER WHAT

{AND DO WHAT YOU WANT ALL DAY}

A One-Time Live Online Workshop with Katrina Ruth, on How to Make Money Anywhere, Anytime, With ZERO Dependance on Any One Platform, Program or Tool … Aka JUST BECAUSE THAT’S WHO YOU ARE … AND – With the Greatest of Ease

> It’s happening Thursday March 21 at 11.30am Brisbane time (Wednesday 9.30pm NYC / 1.30am London, UK)

> All fully recorded if you can’t attend live

> ALL your questions answered (either live during the workshop, or afterwards in the group if you can’t attend live)

> KILLER bonus content on Top 11 Most Effective & Proven ‘When They Zig You Zag’ Sales Secrets

> Live support from meeeeee in the group afterwards for anything extra you want and need to know!

> Free Bonus Entire COURSE for Everyone! My $197 Alignment & Asskickery Toolkit, a 14-Day Smackdown to Bring You Back to YOU, and Into Massive Aligned and Result Based Action! Yes, that’s an entire $197 course and you’re paying less than half of that for this entire workshop!

> All content yours to keep for life!!

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What We Will Be Covering!

1) How to Monetize ANY Situation, Including But Not Limited To:

* When social media or any typically depended upon platform goes down (including examples of how I have down this several times, to the tune of tens of thousands)

* Hater situations (including examples, again multiple times, again tens of thousands of dollars)

* When you make a fool of yourself / something embarrassing happens or you screw up (also examples! also lots and lots of lovely moolah)

* When people ‘screw you over’ (ahem, we will talk about this) or desert you (also examples! more money!)

* Basically how to turn any and all life situations, moods, changes of the moon, emotional ups and downs, real life SHIT, to money!

2) Why the ‘When Shit Happens’ times are often the BEST times to make money, aka this is where I teach you what it really means to understand human psychology in terms of SALES, and the mindset of being an actual IN THE FLOW entrepreneur, who ALWAYS sees opportunity and jumps straight on it

3) When NOT to Monetize (okay that one you can have for free – never!!)

4) Understanding Where Money Really Comes From – and aligning yourself TO the frequency of wealth, such that you can literally NOT.BE.IMPACTED by anything that 99.99% of people think will cost them business

5) Money Vibration Principles Revealed (… my own personal philosophies and things that I live by / instil into my being around this, including my own daily practices)

6) Coding For Success

* How to ALWAYS have an endless stream of ideas

* AUTOMATIC continual unleashment of creativity and imagination, especially in so-called times of struggle

* Seeing past problems and accessing higher self in order to always know the answer, and how to move forward

7) Programming to Upgrade – the beliefs, energetic states and emotional patterns you require in order to be this person, have all this work for you, ALWAYS see and have the ability to act on the shit that will most pay off

The ‘Do What You Want All Day’ Bit:

* Exactly how my typical day flows and how I operate for maximum efficiency of time, energy, mental acuity, soul connectedness, etc

* Getting it all done as a busy entrepreneur (and single Mum, in my case) who also refuses to operate at anything less than EXCELLENT in terms of self-care, fitness, fun, playtime, etc

* Exactly what I do all day, broken down to the detail, to helm this becoming-8-figure-empire

* Exactly what I do NOT do all day, either it just gets ignored (hint: a LOT that most online marketers think matters!), or I let other people do it for me

* Calling in soulmate support, even long before you are ready to afford it

* Optimizing energy, focus, personal power, happiness, general flow. Aka mindset and also brain / nutrition hacks and so on

* TIME MANIFESTATION. OH YES IT IS A THING.

AND, while we’re at it, we will also be talking INSTANT MANIFESTATION. The exact process I use to bring the future into the NOW, by clearing all blocks existing between its reality in the quantum and its physical manifestation in the now!!

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PLUS!

I’ll be doing this ‘Rapid-Fire’ Session at the end!!

1) What it really means to be magnetic online – hint: it’s not about having a pretty and polished website or online presence!

2) Bringing the ‘in private / behind the scenes’ version of you to the public

3) Unapologetic messaging and soul baring to call in your true #soultribe

4) Audience quality vs quality, and active elimination of those who don’t ‘HELL yes’ on your content

5) People don’t buy your products, they buy you. No – people don’t buy you, they buy your energy!! What that means and how to let it out

6) Being real about where you need to take care of YOU in order to be able to show up and shine fully

7) Keeping a laser-focus and tunnel-vision on your own path, and having the courage to pave the way that feels right for you even if it’s not been done before

8) Discernment to walk the line between being polarising and positively outrageous as opposed to just a hot mess 🙂 Scaling and magnetizing FROM the chaos of creativity and following the true artists way!

9) Knowing which ideas to work, what will sell, and how best to sell it so that the entire launch and selling experience is fun AND rewarding for both your audience and you

10) Creating hell yes offers that make them scream yes!

I know!

This workshop is off the HOOK already, and we haven’t even accounted for all the random shiz which will be coming out of me!!

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Don’t forget the bonuses >>>> !!!

> KILLER bonus content on Top 11 Most Effective & Proven ‘When They Zig You Zag’ Sales Secrets

> Live support from meeeeee in the group afterwards for anything extra you want and need to know!

> Free Bonus Entire COURSE for Everyone! My $197 Alignment & Asskickery Toolkit, a 14-Day Smackdown to Bring You Back to YOU, and Into Massive Aligned and Result Based Action! Yes, that’s an entire $197 course and you’re paying less than half of that for this entire workshop!

> All content yours to keep for life!

What are you waiting for? You KNOW that if you apply even ONE tip of the approximately gajillion I’m sharing here you’re going to 100x your investment back! Which is why I am even EXTRA excited to be able to give this to you at such a low price, as per the commandment of my soul!! Plus it’s fun 🙂

Okay then! See you IN there baby!

GET YOUR PLACE NOW! >>> https://zw144.infusionsoft.com/app/orderForms/Monetize-That-Shit-No-Matter-What

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10 Comments

  1. Janette Hopgood says:

    Hi Kat
    I think its very brave of you to let us all know how you are feeling. But also, something I needed to read to help me stop beating myself up when I slip to help me move on. To do what I need to do and release the self sabotage and to believe in myself more and know I can do it – get the body and life I so deserve. Thankyou
    Janette

    1. Kat says:

      Thank you Janette, I really appreciate your comment. And yes – you CAN do it, and so can I 🙂

  2. Bec says:

    Hi Kat
    Your posts lately have been awesome! They have really affected me (in a good way)! This post as well as your post on emotional eating – it’s like you are reading my thoughts. You have really helped me to re-focus and think about what my true goals are; what I really want to achieve and why!! Thank you so much for your honesty and willingness to share

    1. Kat says:

      Thanks Bec, it’s my pleasure. All the best with your journey 🙂

  3. staci says:

    I needed this tonight. Thank you.

    1. Kat says:

      My pleasure Staci, I’m glad it helped.

  4. Christina says:

    Hi Kat, thanks for sharing your battle with binge eating – it’s a secret so many of us are ashamed to talk about. Good luck with getting ready for your shoot – you will look fantastic. xx

    1. Kat says:

      Thanks Christina – I totally agree about the shame side of things, which is one reason I’m really wanting to be open and honest.

  5. Lena Sauter says:

    Wow Kat, thank you so much for allowing us insight into your most vulnerable and honest thoughts. I was deeply moved by what you wrote and admire your courage and strength. I think the most important thing is being honest with ourselves, recognising harmful patterns or behaviours and finding ways to deal with them. I can relate to a lot of what you were writing and your outlook gives me strength and perspective in knowing that I am not alone in my problems. Thanks again and all the best with the photoshoot and the journey you are going through to get there. I hope it will be everything you want it to be.

    1. Kat says:

      Definitely Lena!
      Thanks again

      KAt

Comments are closed.

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