This Is How I Supercharge My Confidence And Get So Much Done!
When it comes to setting goals and considering your true values and purpose, it’s all too easy to beat on yourself for never quite getting there. Never doing enough. For putting things off, or leaving them half finished, or just plain old changing your mind. This was one of the key points I explored in last week’s 7 myths of female fat loss, and I think it warrants just a little bit more attention.
Firstly, this sort of self-awareness is certainly not a bad thing.
It’s crucial to be able to objectively consider how your past actions have led you to where you currently are, and what you would need to do differently in order to reach different outcomes or new goals. So crucial, in fact, that if you just can’t seem to do it yourself I’d strongly recommend hiring a coach of some kind to either make or help you do it. That’s always been one of my tricks – I’ve had coaches for my business (loads of ’em over the years), for my own training (plenty of them as well), for writing, and even for nutrition.
But let’s talk about the concept of considered action – to me there is little more powerful or compelling than writing with fervour about the things I want most passionately to achieve, and detailing ways to get there. I find it exciting, motivating, and it most importantly it drives me to action.
But there is a catch. Actually, there’s two of ’em.
the risk factor
The first is the risk of getting so caught up in thinking, dreaming and planning that you forget to actually take action. I’ve written about that quite recently, over here.
The second risk, which is more of a dangerous one, is to get so caught up in thinking, dreaming and planning about all the things you should or could be doing that you forget to give yourself credit for the fantastic things you are in fact achieving every year, every month, and even every week or day. Before you scoff and click away to something that makes you feel suitably bad about yourself, just give me a moment.
when’s the last time you congratulated that girl in the mirror?
It’s likely that off the top of your head your immediate reaction is to think you’ve achieved nothing remarkable over the past 6 or 12 months. Well even if I don’t personally know you I’m willing to bet that the reality is somewhat different. You wouldn’t be the kind of gal to read Woman Incredible if it weren’t!
So – here’s a little challenge for you, if you can be bothered investing a few minutes in your own mindset and confidence!
I want you to grab the nearest pen and paper or note-keeping device and write a list of 20 great things you’ve achieved over the past 6 months. It might take you a few moments of head scratching to get the ball rolling, but I think you’ll be pleasantly surprised with what you come up with. And push through until you get to 20! You’ll probably find you won’t be able to stop.
I’ll go first, and (if you’re feeling brave) I’d love it if you’d write your list of 20 – or even part of it – as a comment to this post. You’ll see from reading my list that these don’t all have to be earth-shattering things; it’s just about doing something good for yourself or someone else.
- Got up early and went to Bikram yoga this morning even though it was the last thing I felt like doing when the alarm went off at 5.15am. Now I feel relaxed, loosened, and fabulous!
- Drafted every single page of this blog plus am currently drafting the 7th of the first 16 posts. I want 16 ready to go before I launch. (Yup; I wrote the draft of this back in November)
- Have written a full and fairly decent business plan for Woman Incredible, rather than just launching it without thinking about where I want it to go (like I did for Body Incredible)
- I apologised to my husband for being a bit of a biatch when in similar occasions I often focus only on what he is doing wrong.
- I’ve taken on a new apprentice, and interviewed another one to bring on in early 2011.
- I’ve started doing 90% of my writing and creative work first thing in the mornings rather than procrastinating all day. As a result I’ve been achieving what feels like many times the amount of work with far less effort.
- I managed to stay on track with my eating whilst in America for 6 weeks, and even came back 1.5% leaner!
- I’ve lost a further 2-3% body fat since then
- I’ve done half the Christmas shopping
- I’ve started using a budgeting program as a step toward better managing my money
- I’ve stopped chasing up on ‘sometimes’ clients who don’t really want to do what it takes and are a drain on my energy
- I’ve made an appointment with an ex business mentor who always inspires me to reach for new dreams
- I’ve averaged at least 5 workouts a week despite a super hectic schedule
- I got married secretly (eloped!) in the Nevada desert!
- I’ve started eating my protein more regularly (4-6 small serves a day rather than 2 massive serves) instead of making excuses about being too busy to do otherwise.
- I’ve resisted turning the computer on in the early evenings when I’ve ‘got so much to do’, and spent quality time with my daughter – I’m not perfect at this yet, but getting there!
- I’ve attended an 8-day strength and conditioning course by the world’s leading Institute for such, and have done well at it even though much of the content is over my head.
- I’ve set limits around the amount of time I spend on emails and admin.
- I took 2 hours out in the middle of a 14-hour workday to actually relax and hang out with a friend in the park! (Big one for me)
- I’ve managed the occasional night without the ‘must have’ glass of wine.
Whew! That felt kind of tough, especially around the number 9 mark, but I pushed through. And you know what? That only took me about 15 minutes, but I feel incredible for it. I guarantee you, if you’re like me in that you spend most of your mental energy thinking about what else you could/should be doing, or what you could/should have done differently, then this exercise is a MUST for you. After all, how on earth are you ever going to truly move forward if you don’t feed off the energy and power of everything you’ve already worked so hard for?
So, over to you.
If you dare put down your busy-list for a few minutes, then I urge you to take some time to consider just how you-know-what-hot you actually are. This is not about building yourself up for no discernible reason! Rather it’s about being empowered by the acknowledgment of just what an incredible woman you already are – and harnessing the energy and self-belief you need to get out there and start chasing that next set of dreams!
Feel free to share one or more of your ‘wins’ in the comments below, or tell everyone how this exercise affected you!
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Great post Kat!
I will have a go at 20…here goes!
1) I’ve made a huge lifestyle choice and started eating a protein and good fats breakfast EVERY DAY
2) I have eliminated certain things from my diet – the most difficult ones (to begin with!) being white rice, pasta, sweet corn and lollies!
3) I got married in November 2010!
4) We relocated our home in September 2010 from London to Melbourne after living there for nearly 6 years.
5) I started a new job in October 2010
6) I started doing Bikram Yoga, and I finally managed to touch my toes with straight legs!
7) I have started priotising sleep in my schedule.
8) I recognised that marathon running was not for me and made the decision to not run another marathon again!
9) I started lifting weights in the gym rather than just using cardio machines
10) I lost a significant amount of body fat last year through some of the lifestyle changes I mentioned above (namely diet and exercise)
11) I overcame my scepticism for supplements and now regularly take supplements as part of my normal everyday life
12) I have converted to organic meat and veggies (most of the time!).
13) I have committed to a financial plan for my husband and I.
14) I have a good regular exercise regime
15) I have started reading more about different views on diet and exercise (both books and online)
16) I eat protein at every meal time
17) I have signed up for the Woman Incredible transformation day!
18) And I have a very close friend coming with me to the Woman Incredible Transformation day! (not really an achievement, but I am very excited about this fact!)
19) I drink in excess of 3 litres of water each day
20) I have stopped drinking coffee after lunch time
OK …that was a great exercise, took me quite a while to get to 20!
Thanks Kat for the inspiration! Feeling great about myself now!
Wow, I just got SO inspired again reading your list Michelle! Truly awesome.You rock!
OK .. this one is gonna get a bit personal …
1) My marriage ended on his terms and when he decided that he ‘might have made a mistake’ I put our son first and we agreed that it isn’t the right decision to go back even though it would have made me happier in the short term, I know that in the long term it would have dragged out and our son would have been that little bit older to understand what was going on.
2) I picked up my strength training again
3) I have started eating right again
4) I started a new job and have made a massive impact. Still work in progress but I know I’m with a company that truly values all that I bring
5) I decorated my kitchen bright turquoise and duck egg blue .. by myself in 2 days.
6) I completed my grateful log
7) I read ‘The Secret’ and truly understand the value of positive thinking and the law of attraction
8) I have taught my son lots of new words
9) I no longer get scared to drive long distances and because of that I’m more spontaneous
10) I have realised that there is more to life than just training and eating right and I need to cut lose every now and again
11) I have stopped beating myself up about the failure of my marriage and accepted that in the future I will be happier as will our son
12) I have started reading Woman Incredible again!
13) I have got back in contact with a friend I’d cherished but we had a falling out years ago and I missed her every day since
14) I am closer with all my family and friends again
15) I have done all my washing and can now see the bottom of the wash bin
16) I have gutted my garden ready to put in all the flowers in time for summer and family BBQ’s
17) I have learnt to accept my body after having a baby and know that I really have made remarkable progress. Size 10 to Size 6 – now just need to get my muscle back after 12 weeks of minimal training!
18) I know who my real friends and family are and cherish them dearly
19) I am trying to be less of a control freak
20) I have time for me and will not make my life all about a partner but compliment it with the attributes that I have and in time that will be respected and appreciated by the right person.
There.. bit personal .. but you’re right .. I do feel better and that’s all within the last 3 months.
That’s amazing. Such an honest and open list; and I’m so honoured that you shared that with me and every other Woman Incredible reader. I especially like number 15 🙂
Kat – I felt like this post was written directly to me! Exactly what I needed today. Here’s my list:
1) Started my new blog and revamped my business website
2) Served on the Board of Directors for the local chapter of my professional association
3) Participated in 5-day healthy nutritional detox
4) Landed a full time job to pay the bills while transitioning from an in-person to virtual business model
5) Gave up t.v. past 10pm in favor of more/better sleep
6) Negotiated with my cell phone carrier to cut my monthly bill in half
7) Started regularly contributing to my savings account
8) Automated regular payments for several bills so I don’t have to think about them each month
9) Taught my first tele-seminar
10) Discovered several fantastic online resources/communities to help me achieve my goals (including this one!) and spend much more time learning online than browsing entertainment news & gossip sites
11) Took two weekend trips out of the city with friends to relax and recharge outdoors
12) Let go of “just ok” or sub-par relationships (both personal and business) to make room for great ones
13) Started cooking healthy meals more regularly
14) Practiced new habit of waking up an hour earlier – not successful every day yet but getting there!
15) Got back into exercise routine in March
16) Identified new goals for my business that reignited my passion for my work
17) Co-hosted an event for women around health and wellness with a group other local entrepreneurs
18) Helped my grandparents unpack and settle into their new home
19) Tried acro yoga (acrobatics/yoga)
20) Actively working on trading negative thoughts for positive ones
Wow, that was tough! Definitely slowed down around the halfway point, but great exercise:) Thanks!
Very cool Alison! Man – it sounds like you’ve done more in the past year than most people do in a decade! A very enviable list 🙂 well done!
Hi Kat! Just love this blog post! So inspiring reading what everyone has achieved. Here’s my list:
1. Trained extra hard, including paying for 3 PT sessions a week, in pursuit of a fantastic photo shoot
2. Shot an amazing photo shoot!
3. Ended my contract at Fitness First and started up at Fit n Fast
4. Dyed my hair blonde!
5. I’ve done at least 3 stints of no alcohol for at least 10 days
6. I’ve built a great business relationship with a fantastic naturopath
7. Started a gratitude diary
8. Fell in love
9. Was a shoulder to cry on several times for someone I care deeply for
10. Chose to not judge someone for actions he did that I wouldn’t choose for myself
11. Started talking more often to one of my sisters
12. Started sleeping better! Yay!
13. Confronted my current flatmate about an issue I was most anxious to tell him about, and got a great result!
14. Shot a pilot for a lifestyle web show where I was the presenter, and surprised myself at how natural I was and how much I enjoyed it!
15. Cut out all sugar from my diet for 7 days
16. Have already gone on two interstate trips and will be going on my third next month and overseas in October! After not going on holiday for almost 12 months last year, going on more this year was a promise I made to myself 🙂
17. Have changed my body shape for the better by cutting back on circuit training and doing more traditional strength training.
18. Dedicated more time to self development. I’m constantly in pursuit of happiness and keeping positive. Whenever I feel down I work hard on changing my thought process by either reading inspiring blogs like Woman Incredible, or by chatting to my greatest mentor, my mum
19. Sent my pics to Women’s Health & Fitness and Women’s Health and got contacted within 24hrs by both publications! Hoping to shoot with one (or both!) of them this year
20. Started a 10 week acting course this Tuesday to find out if it is still my passion
Hey Liz! What an inspiring and uplifting list! Wow – I especially relate to and love # 12 🙂 … and congrats on being contacted by both those mags; I’d say that’s amazing except I’ve seen the photos and I know it’s not really amazing it’s only to be expected that they’d want to talk to you! Sounds like there are huge things ahead for you this year and beyond 🙂