IT’S OUTRAGEOUS THAT YOU’RE NOT YET WHERE YOU WANT TO BE
“How did I get to 200k per month in the end?”
It was a focus, a gazing upon, an expectation and an assumption … I didn’t really DO anything. I just kept coming back to it in my mind.
I felt a pressure that I ‘had’ to, it was completely not possible that I WOULDN’T get there. I wasn’t available for that. There was a feeling of OUTRAGE there, that I wasn’t there, and it fuelled my belief, my internal focus, my ability to dial it in and just BECOME the person who made that much money”
The interview took place, as the most insightful ones generally do, not between me and a host of a show, or a journalist or such, but instead, between me and, well – me.
My journal is always the place where the greatest truths are revealed, where I re-find and re-member myself, where I kick my own ass, where I become once again born again, ready again, renewed again, and CERTAIN of what the next ‘must’ is which I WILL create into my life.
Since hitting 200k per month in income I’ve gone on to pass 300k and also 400k, but the reason I looked in on what was in place inside of me to hit 200k is because I remember that as being something which felt quite HARD to achieve. I felt like I was holding it at arms length … it took what I deemed an unreasonable amount of time … actually it was about 9 months after I first hit 100k, it’s funny now to look back and remember how impatient I was, how ridiculous I thought it was that I wasn’t yet there, but anyway –
The 200k/ month marker was one I gave serious intent and focus to. It felt SO out of reach, so ‘impossible’, so NOT energetically normal or aligned or even available, my brain would turn cartwheels trying to figure out the ‘how’, but somewhere not-very-deep-within at all, I knew it WOULD happen.
300k and 400k were easier because for whatever reason I didn’t have those next level achievements up on any sort of pedestal. I wasn’t looking to be validated by passing those points, I really did just EXPECT to, and I was kind of ‘head down and ass up’ just doing the work.
Without even THINKING about it, I became the person who made money like that.
I was pondering on all this this morning, as I thought about the thing I really MOST want in my life right now, which I don’t yet have.
Perhaps you have such a thing and you can bring it to mind right now, get a little more out of this blog than what you would if you just read it on a surface level.
Got it? Good!
For me that thing is a committed relationship. With a manly man. Who is grounded, kind, emotionally stable (these things rank pretty highly for me after the wild volatility of my previous relationship), also emotionally intelligent, hot, fit, sex, successful, purpose-driven, loves life and loves me!
For starters 
Of course a big part of my journaling when I go into my man stuff is around who I need to be, around energetically being the woman who is a match for that. There’s a whole ‘nother post in there for sure!! Not for today 
What is relevant here, is I notice it feels … so hard. Impossible. Not available. Like HOWWWWWWW on earth will that come to pass?
Many manifestation ‘experts’ would shake their heads wisely in woe at this reveal of mine, stating that if we think things are so hard, out of reach, etcetera, then – they will be!
This is true, I would say the same on many occasions. But then again …
How I feel about the man stuff is the same way I felt about hitting the then-elusive 200k per month.
It felt out of reach on the one hand, and yeah, I probably prolonged it because I let frustration take over and I got super caught up in ‘how’, but at the same time I DID always know it was going to happen. With each day that passed, it became more and more ridiculous to me – outrageous, really! – that I wasn’t there.
And at a certain point, that pressure just tipped into some kind of almost FORCED alignment to the next level. The outrage at not being there overcame the fear, the worry about ‘how’, the frustration, the THINKING, and boom –
I just became that person. When it happened, it happened as if from nowhere, ‘overnight’ (well, + 3 decades or so of PD ), like magic. There was CERTAINLY no ‘how’. I didn’t suddenly start selling a whole bunch more stuff … doing things differently … I just BECAME different on the inside.
When it comes to manifestation, I believe that firstly there are multiple ways to GIT it, and secondly –
Sometimes it IS about ‘forcing it’.
On the one hand, it’s absolutely and irrefutably true that the easiest unlocking of next level awesomeness in my life has come about when I am just head down ass up, as I mentioned before, doing my thang. And then – boom! All of a sudden I realised I was making X amount of money … abs had shown up … life was flowing … etc!
For SURE the best way to HAVE or ACHIEVE anything is when you’re just BEING the person who would have that, and it becomes a natural outcome!
It’s one reason I so frequently mentor and guide people on being the person. Looking at the beliefs, mindsets, habits, expectations, aligned actions, etc, which would be in place if you were! I tell ya – if you just keep tuning in on THAT each day, and then follow through on it as best as you can, the reality changes WILL show up.
They have too.
But, what about when it just doesn’t seem to be taking?
What if you GET that it’s about BEING the person, and indeed you are practicing that (I hope you are, who else are ya tryna be if not? An old you?!), but you’re still not there?
What if, for reasons you can’t figure out – and sometimes I think we just can’t EVER figure all things out, and thank God for that! – this particular level is just HARDER to achieve, and you can’t seem to break through?
In this case, my personal experience has been that there needs to be a pressure build up.
A ‘fuck this shit’ point, basically.
YES, on my path to 200k/ month (and indeed every other next level goal I’ve achieved which has been HARD), I definitely tuned in daily. Set my intentions. Locked it in and released it. Then did the daily practices, best as I could, to be that person.
YES, for sure I can say now, from retrospect, that all of this did not work in the way it should have, because I was SUPER attached, and I had the goal on a pedestal.
But YES, also – I knew that at the time! And for whatever reason, I just couldn’t seem to get past it!
What WORKED was, I let the outrage build.
Day by day.
A dear friend mentioned to me recently, after I said I felt like I was reaching a ‘fuck this shit’ point relevant to dating, and calling in my MAN, that maybe that was a scarcity vibe which would push it away.
I disagreed, and told her so.
MANY things I have called in in my life have come about because I reached a breaking point.
An enough was enough point.
FUCK.
THIS.
SHIT, I am DONE, and now it is just gonna BE!
I believe that when you let something become OUTRAGEOUS, ridiculous that it’s not there, there is a kind of flicking of a switch which happens.
BOOM – the old just falls away because all of a sudden you NO LONGER ALLOW SPACE FOR IT.
Maybe I got to 200k/ month because I focused on it every day, aligned to it every day as best as I could, and meanwhile I was also – always! – consistently doing the work.
Or maybe I got there because eventually the pressure of NOT being there became powerfully and POSITIVELY impactful in that it just ‘snapped’ me into my new reality.
I don’t really care which is true, they’re both true!
But I do know this –
Complacency won’t get you ANY place.
Maybe you want to hit a next income level.
Maybe you want a fabulous person in your life to date, or more.
Maybe you want to change your body.
Maybe you want that car, that house, a boat, a yacht, a moat!
Maybe you want it ALL! Well, you can have it. But if it’s just ‘nice to have’ … if it’s not REQUIRED … EXPECTED … like DUH … it’s not gonna show up.
Even the stuff I’ve achieved with ease (such as how I mentioned relevant to hitting 300k and 400k p/month) was because it was REQUIRED, expected, like DUH, just in those specific cases, for me personally, I didn’t make ’em hard in my head.
I guess I expected them but I didn’t feel like I needed them in order to be enough.
Now, nothing in life will generally show up when we think we need it in order to be ‘enough’, and that’s not a great place to achieve from anyhow.
But if you’re there?
Holding shit you KNOW is divined at arms length?
And about sick and tired of waiting?
Maybe it’s time to take that word ENOUGH,
and make it ENOUGH.
I am just DONE.
I don’t even CARE how.
It’s OUTRAGEOUS that I’m not there yet.
AND SO IT IS.
In the end, it’s very simple –
There’s either a part of you accepting where you are now, and that is why you continue to BE there. Or?
There’s not.
And so you’re not.
What’s for sure is this:
You’re here.
And that’s exactly where you’ve made it a must to be. You could even say, it’d be outrageous to NOT be here. Which is why you are.
True?
True.
Remember –
Life is Now. Press Play.
Kat
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