MY NO IS A CLEAR NO, MY YES IS A CLEAR YES
The reason you struggle to consistently sign up the level of soulmate clients you know you REALLY are meant to work with and absolutely can help … the high level badasses who are already crushing it but YOU KNOW YOUR WORK COULD TAKE THEM SO MUCH DEEPER, is a simple issue of ENERGY.
Your energy, specifically, and how it’s continually sending out mixed signals, confusing people, NOT showing who you really are, what you stand for, what your boundaries and expectations are and what people can therefore KNOW IN ADVANCE (with or without you telling ’em!) if they work with you.
In a general ‘make life easier’ sense, one of the MOST powerful things you can do is to get clear on the signals you’re sending, and then be CONSISTENT with that shit.
We do it all the time, of course.
I tell my puppy earlier today “no!” and growl at him a little like the good pretend Mumma-dog I am, when he eats an entire corner off of the wall, but then within less than half a second I’m squishing his little Frenchie face and giving him kisses all over the head while I tell him what a NAUGHTY beautiful baby criminal he is.
Yeah … I’m sure the “No!” was clearly heard and understood. Haha.
Or, take my relationship with my children’s father, my ex-husband.
I have been CLEAR on my boundaries, standards, requirements, for communication as co-parents and respectful adults, and as far as where we now stand, a MILLION times.
So why is it (I often bemoan to my friends and trusted advisors) things still seem SO DAMN ENTANGLED? Like an Octopus has his tentacles all the way through me, is how I often feel! The energy is ALL messed up.
DUHHHHHHH … because I’m clearly not being decisive and FIRM in my energy.
I say one thing.
My energy however says another. It is riddled with uncertainty, insecurity, fear, guilt, shame, you name it! Sounds awful, I know! I don’t mean this is true all the time, not by a long shot. MOSTLY I am clear, calm, grounded, certain in how to communicate and also in what I desire and require in response. This – works. But at times, yeah. The old triggers get me. The old stories get me. The old PAIN gets me, and feels all-too-real in the now.
And so my energy starts acting like some kind of freaked out SCREECHING radio wave, resulting more often than not in confusion or aggression or just NOT getting what I want in terms of communication or peaceful connection relevant to our children.
I am okay with all of this, in that I am proud at myself for the work I HAVE done around it and also continue to do around it, with key people who support me on that. I am always improving, in all areas!
That’s a big area I suppose, probably the biggest one for me personally, but really – ANY place we are sending mixed signals out is a place where we shouldn’t be surprised if we’re not getting what we want.
Say you want one thing relevant to your body, and that you’re going to cut sugar / drop back on wine / eat more greens and workout more, etc, but then break your own rules every time you had a bad hair day? Or, just stare at yourself in the mirror and HATE on what you see, energetically transmitting I AM NOT ENOUGH, rather than being INTERNALLY the version of you who is already there?
Yepppp … mixed signals.
Transmission: unable to be read.
It’s pretty simple, really!
In business, and specifically with signing up (well, effortlessly and magnetically attracting in, like magic, from nowhere) high-level clients, but REALLY with drawing in soulmate peeps at ANY level –
The kind who wanna buy ALL your stuff ALL the time, without even looking at the details –
How this works is damn obvious, isn’t it?
You SAY you’re here to work with a certain type of client.
She’s badass, fearless, a leader, she is ALREADY taking action and creating killer results in her life, she shows up like this, she invests in herself like that, you have the vision of her in your mind in NO uncertain terms!
And, you even put that vision out there as well, don’t you?
Proudly stating what you stand for.
Who you are here to help.
What YOUR clients are like and why they are so EXTRA.
Or, you do one of those ranty “I’ll no longer stand for such and such bullshit!” posts on the internet, about all the ways in which you are now gonna OWN YOUR SHIT … 10X YOUR PRICES … NEVER ACCEPT BLAH BLAH BLAH AGAIN … WATCH OUT WORLD!
Everybody hell yeahs!
Everybody says YAAASSSSS Queen!
Rihanna and Beyonce gifs are PLENTIFUL in supply!
You feel so good! Dopamine is the BEST! And you got an EXTRA hit today, what an action-taking badass you are!
And then the very next week … day … heck, I’ve even seen it happen later the same day … you’re posting some extra special ‘never seen before’ discount that is SO SPECIAL but really just screams ‘fuck, I need a sale NOW’.
Or, you’re signing someone up who categorically is NOT amazing … in fact something about their energy just makes you want to run screaming for the other side of the planet … in your soul you KNOW you can’t really help this person because THEY ARE NOT LIKE YOU AND THEY DON’T GET IT, or they specifically have somethin’ going on which you SWORE you’d never accept in a client again … but hey, they agreed to pay, sorta, sure it seems to be like pulling teeth to get it, but it can work can’t it?
You KNOW you know what I’m talking about here
And what this really is of course is a conversation around INTEGRITY.
If you were IN it –
There would be ZERO DEVIANCE FROM IT.
Your no would mean no.
Your yes would mean yes.
About who you are.
What you stand for.
Who you work with.
At ALL levels.
And what your entire damn message and soul service is in the first place!
This would mean that when you say you’re not gonna sell certain shit anymore because you got a burst of inner power and admitted it’s not aligned you would then FOLLOW THROUGH ON THAT. PERRRRRRMMMMMMMAAANNNNNANN
It would mean that when you rant and rage to your partner, your mentor, your friends, your journal, that you’re SO DONE with such and such, or with how certain people show up, or with not showing ALL of your naked soul, there would then be action forthcoming from that.
It would mean that when you rip a damn bandaid, it stays ripped.
When you say ‘never again!’, you CUT THE DAMN CORD THAT EVEN MAKES AGAIN POSSIBLE.
It would mean taking what you say in private –
And BOLDLY telling it to the whole world, because hey –
If you’re gonna swear on a course of action or on BECOMING something but then you can’t talk about it publicly, do you even have any intent of backing that up?
Or is it just a pipedream like everything else you SAY you’re gonna do?
Continually stamping your foot, connecting to deeper purpose, reminding yourself what you’re damn here for and then getting some kind of quick-fix validation but never actually making it WHO YOU DAMN ARE.
I KNOW you know what I mean, because we ALL do this in different ways.
And maybe that’s okay.
Maybe it’s just how it is.
Maybe your no doesn’t really mean no, and your yes means whatever-the-frick-you-the
Or maybe –
You’re done with spinning one tune in your own mind where courage and certainty is at its greatest, and then creating a life that shrieks FAILED TO FUCKING BACK HERSELF all around that.
It’s up to you.
It’s ALWAYS up to you.
But if you don’t have what you want then just a lil tip for you –
Might be helpful to start acting ENERGETICALLY AND IN ALL POSSIBLE OTHER WAYS like it’s actually what you want –
KNOW you are worthy of –
And insist upon.
Don’t forget – !
Life is Now. Press Play.
Don’t forget –
Life is Now. Press Play.