Stop Being Scared of Scaring Off Men, Clients, the World, with JUST HOW DAMN BRILLIANT YOU ARE
Aren’t you a little sick and tired by now of holding back your brilliance, in order to not offend or unsettle people?
I don’t even know if you consciously know you’re doing this … but seriously girl –
It’s written all over you.
In the way you shrink down, just a little.
Hold your posture, just so – not TOO bold, not too stately, not like the damn QUEEN you at times talk about being and know you COULD be, except for that being a QUEEN is an energy, and it does not look, like that.
I see it in the way you dance carefully around your accomplishments, ESPECIALLY when there’s normal people around, especially especially (and this one is for my single ladies!) when there are MEN around.
Careful careful!
Don’t wanna scare him off! Don’t wanna shine TOO bright! Don’t wanna intimidate him! Don’t wanna see another man deflate just a little, barely noticeable but still, when they realise JUST HOW DAMN MUCH YOU HAVE GOING ON.
How much you have going on? ALLLLLL of it, no need to be coy with ME. I KNOW what’s up, I see you, I sense you, and of course I most certainly AM you.
I see the looks.
The spark of realisation.
The ohhhhhhhh
When people realise that I, you, US, THIS chick right here is THAT sort of woman.
Oh, she’s like that … ohhhhh.
Ba-bom.
Another potential suitor bites the dust, at least unless you’re in the habit of collecting men who just gaze at you with fascination all day, constantly wanting to learn and grow from being around you … which is nice, and God knows I’m not against it, but it needs to come hand in hand with them owning THEIR shit and how damn awesome they are.
Of course it’s ALL just a reflection, always, we know this.
Whether it’s men –
Potential friends –
Fuck, even clients! Do you know how many clients or would-be clients I’ve lost over the past few years for shining too damn bright? A LOT. Just the other day I heard of a previous 1:1 client of mine who I worked with for ages, loved and SO adored, who apparently now goes around talking about how I just became too superficial. And there’s been a LOT of talk, I hear the whispers and sometimes even direct feedback, around that sort of stuff, as over the past year or two I’ve actively stepped BOLDLY into owning next level-hotness, and choosing how I wanna express it.
You too at times, in ways? Yeah … thought so!
So tired, so old, so overused, but still so cutting somehow!
Anyway, of course it’s a reflection.
I journaled a little on this today, after having an aha around the fact that why I’ve held my income steady for 2 years now (steady at 300-450k per month, but still!) instead of letting it climb is because then I’d be even MORE ‘too much’ for men.
“Fuck me!”, I wrote. “Is this why I haven’t gone to the next level financially? Because I’m worried I’m already so separate from the men I meet with my success?? facepalm!”
“They ALREADY don’t know how to handle my success. Okay. I can shift this.
I am ready to attract in a man who can handle ALL of how hot, rich, sexy, empowered and free I am!!
hmmm … I am ready to be ALL that I am
I am ready to shine fucking bright
I am ready to be even bolder, richer, hotter, more successful, more switched ON, and I know that there are men out there who will MORE than hold space for that, be ready for it, expect it!
I am done with dialing down my gifts and talents, and how powerful I am
I am done with HIDING my brilliance
I am done with being a little LESS than in order to better fit in
I am a SERIOUSLY WEALTHY SELF MADE WOMAN who also happens to be hot as FUCK, in fantastic shape for 39 (or any age), intelligent, funny, witty, insightful, intuitive and a WHOLE bunch more besides
I am ready to date a man who can MORE than match all of that. Meet it, match it, surpass it! Who teaches me SO much. Who also expects his woman to be on fire in all areas like that.
Time to TURN UP THE BRILLIANCE
TURN UP THE BRILLIANCE.
Ok.
turn it up turn it up turn it up”
Ha, I wasn’t going to publish all of that. Even as I wrote it in my OWN FUCKING JOURNAL I was thinking GOSH – imagine someone saw this, look at me going on about how awesome I am! I was already predicting responses in my head, what the ‘Wise Woman of Love’ will say about it.
The Wise Women of Love? You know the ones, they’re in a relationship that rocks and are SUPER quick to jump on any posts a single woman makes about what she wants in a man, pointing out with deep owly ponderment and a head nod inclined just slightly to the side that women should stop saying what they want in a man and ‘become the woman who would attract such a man / focus on their own energy etc’. Like … DUH girlfriend. #goeswithoutsaying so stop harping on and on about it, essentially shaming other ladies everytime they boldly own their desires!! Someone stating they are ready for MORE and being specific on that is a thing to celebrate! Why not ASSUME they are doing their inner work around it and not indeed publishing every damn bit of that with each and every post they put up about the ‘here’s what I want!’ bits.
Anyway. Just something that SHITS ME RIGHT UP THE TRIGGER-WALL AND BACK AGAIN. Haha.
Soooooooo
Where were we?!
Oh yeah, I was journaling about turning it up, about being ALL that I am and then some, about standing even MORE audaciously in my badass womanhood, and about allowing myself to EXPECT to meet men who can hold space for that, who EXPECT it, and who would not indeed expect anything less!
I know they’re out there.
I know if I’ve not been seeing it then what is ACTUALLY going on is I am scared of my OWN brilliance.
And I know this relates not only to men, but like I said, to business. To client and online follower attraction. To the media, or other messengers with whom I may desire to collaborate or message with in some way. Etc.
You too, again? THOUGHT SO!
But here is what I know for sure, about all of THAT.
The people in my life who are the MOST soul aligned –
(Clients, friends, lover type persons, peers, all of ’em)
– were categorically NOT in my life when I was playing smaller, when I was hiding my brilliance, when I was being careful, or in any way concerning myself with what people thought of me or expected from me.
What WAS there was a mish-mash of sorta aligned people. Which is to say NOT FUCKING ALIGNED AT ALL, since alignment is 100% YES or it’s hell no.
How I called in so many fuck yeah people into my life is indeed I DID become an energetic match for them. (Just as the Wise Women of Love say!! I’m not saying they’re not right, I’m saying find a new bloody tune to sing it’s SO predictable. lol).
The clients I have now, for example, would not even have SEEN me back when I was the not bold, not audacious, not ‘all of me’ version of me. Why would they have cared? They would have looked straight past me, like a ghost.
Pretty damn certain the same thing goes with attracting in hot as fuck sexy smart passion and purpose-driven grown up men!!
All of which is just a REALLY long way of saying the following:
STOP WORRYING ABOUT WHAT WILL HAPPEN WHEN PEOPLE FIND OUT JUST HOW DAMN NEXT LEVEL YOU ACTUALLY ARE.
You know the right peeps for you are out there. You KNOW this.
The ones who will love you, lift you, celebrate you, pay you (the clients presumably not the men haha), hold space for you and also EQUALLY INSPIRE AND EMPOWER YOU WITH THEIR AWESOME.
But if you don’t actually BE you, and I mean stood up super tall and proud and with BELLS on, then guess what sister?
They ain’t gonna see you.
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