Discipline & Flow


Most of the angst I’ve experienced relevant to building, running, maintaining and growing a multi-million dollar online business has not actually come from what I needed to do to either get here or stay here, but instead from my ideas of what I thought I needed to do.

If you think about it, most of LIFE’S stress comes not from what we actually do, who we choose to be, the choices we make in our life, but rather from our worry that we’re in some way breaking rules … doing it wrong … being judged or ‘frowned upon’ by whomever it is we’ve apparently appointed as judge and jury of our lives!

Sadly, a huge majority of people seem to have appointed, well – the entire world as their judge and juror! Basically anyone who is NOT them and has even the slightest semblance of social or business standing is qualified to decide what the appropriate way to live … do business … parent … breathe is!

I’m sure if you laid it out like that, nobody would agree that this is at all reasonable but yet they continue to live in such a way which shows that, on an unconscious level, they think otherwise.

It’s almost as though, at some point along the way, they made a soul contract to do anything BUT follow soul!

It’s wildly popular to talk about ‘not giving a fuck’, or to ‘hell yes’ all over the place at the idea that we should get to pave our own way, into unchartered territories, creating a path where there was none before because duh – there can’t BE a path where you were meant to create one, but the cold hard REALITY is that societal brainwashing is alive and well and is being MANIFESTED on the daily in the form of purpose-driven entrepreneurs, artists, PEOPLE, NOT living their purpose, NOT following what’s inside of them, NOT being who they really are, who they long to be, and who indeed they MUST be if they’re at all to be fulfilled, happy, feel ALIVE, and free. Never mind make a helluva lot of money and impact the WORLD with what’s in them!

It’s all just conditioning of course. From the youngest age we are TAUGHT to fit in, follow the rules, do it right, and we’ve also gotta deal with our genetic coding, which basically prompts the same! It’s a survival instinct – stay with the pack, if you end up outside of the pack you’ll DIE!

When I look back on my business journey, and the MASSIVE amounts of stress, worry, panic I’ve experienced at various points, and also consider the now infinitely rarer occasions when I still feel some element of concern, it’s clear to me that in 99% of cases there would have been NO issue had I just know that I’m allowed to do what I want, there are no rules, and if it FEELS right – aka I’m guided from inside of me to do it – then it is!

At some point along the way I started to clue in on this, and slowly but surely let go of various things which I’d previously only been doing because I thought it was ‘proper’, or expected, or that people would not be happy with me / accept me / pay me / etc if I didn’t.

Specifically, these were things that I MYSELF had no natural desire or leaning to want to give time or energy to, and therefore also things which, when I did try to do ’em right, exhausted me. Drained my soul! Made business seem HARD, and like something which ‘took’.

Not so long ago, a guy who I REALLY REALLY wanted to properly date, thought I was meant to be in a serious relationship with, said something to me which at the time confused me and made me want to argue against it. He said –

“I’m just not willing to give a piece of me to somebody”

I didn’t get it … what did he mean, give a piece of him? My experience of a HEALTHY relationship (and certainly I’ve had plenty of experience of the opposite!) is that it GIVES to you, expands you, energises you, you GAIN from it! Just like how working out ‘takes’ energy – as in time, effort, etc – but actually it GIVES you energy. This is true of course for all relationships, including professional.

Just like how THESE days – my BUSINESS only GIVES me energy, growth, expansion, allows me to be MORE me, even as I ‘give’ so much of it to myself. The return is infinitely greater than the investment.

At the time, with the relationship, I hadn’t yet figured out that if it ain’t flowing it AIN’T FLOWING, no matter how much there’s an energetic or soul connection there. ALL elements are either flow and ease or – they’re not!

I’m so glad that at this point in my journey I am clear that I’m ONLY available for dating / being with a man who is secure, grounded, stable, and actively POSITIVE-minded about a relationship being something which adds value. Amongst other traits and qualities 🙂

In my business, when I believed that I had to do or give myself to certain things which TOOK from me, which ‘cost’ me something and didn’t return 10X, 100X, 1000X the value in return, I often felt resentful, exhausted, run down, burnt out, just not HAPPY. I’m talking about a return energetically, ’cause God knows that if the return is only dollars then it don’t FEEL like a return … never mind that if you ain’t feelin’ it then the $$$ are unlikely to really show up. Which meant that, as much as I was apparently willing to sacrifice contentment in the moment in order to get to an outcome – the outcome was never forthcoming!

Now, in my business, and also in my life, there’s not a single thing I do which only TAKES from me or which doesn’t feel like flow. If by chance I notice something start to feel that way I swiftly deal with it! Some of the things I’ve had to let go of, in order to get to where business TRULY feels like flow and ease AND I also really do get to make millions of dollars a year JUST by being me include, in no particular order:

– the idea that I need a professional website / photos / anything in order to be successful
– the idea that my videos or livestreams or even paid trainings need to be pre-prepared … scripted … have a ‘proper’ backdrop … have me all fancy lookin’ … be anything except (as one client put it yesterday) me sitting on the floor of my bedroom and jamming, so to speak
– the idea that my courses need everything pre-planned as far as content, or pre-booked as far as schedule for live trainings, or that I have to deliver content in any sort of modality / fashion / timeframe / organised manner. Recently I’ve taken this to the next level by not even announcing live trainings at ALL in advance!
– doing internet market-y ANYTHING by the book as far as launching, marketing, advertising, email campaigns / funnels
– doing JV / affiliate shit (SO not into it, don’t wanna! Used to buy into the nonsense that I had to)
– the ridiculous notion that I need to in any way filter my language / randonmness / silliness, etc, or be ‘professional’ (the more NOT professional and instead JUST the real me I am, the more my business grows and money flows!)
– the now hilarious idea that a launch needs to in any way tire you out, or take more than an hour or two to put together and go live with … or that you can’t just launch on repeat
– the silly idea that you have to ‘get leads’ ‘do sales calls’ or take ANY energy at all to attract in and sign up high-ticket clients. They should show up just ’cause you intend for them to, and you be you!
– a million other things I can’t remember right now! Maybe add some of the silly rules you’ve let go of along the way in the comments!

You can see why my business is so flow … I REALLY don’t do ANYTHING except just be me (which translates into write / speak / unleash my crazy on the internet each day, and then expect people to listen, follow, pay me), including that I don’t bother myself with doing ANYTHING not fun or natural in order to then leverage said me-ness.

In other words, my business works BECAUSE I am only me, no frills, and so who and what I attract in is an energetic match!

Just like how I know that when my new man shows up it’ll be because it’s an energetic match, not because of ANY games / planning / trying / bein’ fancy.

In fact, the more I am ONLY me, and trust that that is enough, in fact is required, the more EVERY part of my life works, both in harmony with every other part, but also to a standard of excellence IN that particular area.

It really is quite funny how hard we make it, don’t you think?!

ESPECIALLY when the answers have been there all along.

The thing you have to remember, if this in any way feels confusing for you or you’re scared it can’t work, is that whoever the frick it is that you think is in charge of the whole shindig, who you’ve appointed as judge and juror of your damn LIFE, is ONLY qualified to pave their own way.

Just as YOU are the only one qualified to pave your way, and to be you.

Thing is though –

If you don’t own that, ain’t nobody else gonna be able to do it for you, or even help you.

The good news is –

It’s on you, to allow in ALL that you dream of. You have full control and choice. And everything you long for is available when you simply BE.FULLY.YOU. So cut – now – EVERY single thing you’re doing because something NOT in you says it’s required.

The sobering news is –

It’s on you.

What’chu gonna do about it?



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