JUST DANCE

I hate stopping. When I’m in the flow, and in the thick of it, caught up in momentum, and not even realising I am DOING, because I am so dropped in to BEING, is when I create the most, unleash the most, end up selling the most, impact others the most, and also feel the most ME.

In this state of being, I am barely aware of any sort of idea of exertion, or push, or hustle, and certainly there is no ‘must’.

I feel as though all I’m doing is twirl twirl twirling in the most beautiful and fun dance with life itself, I’ve no idea of each next move until it is upon me and I am upon it and together we are one, and yet somehow, from this crazy NON-thinking back and forth with life itself –

Content is created.
Programs unleashed, sold, delivered, complete.
Clients and community near and far receive what they need.
Team is instructed.
Biz-niz is RAN.

When I’m in the dance, in the flow, in the BEING-ness of being Katrina Ruth, I am vaguely aware … perhaps greatly aware … that this goes far, far beyond me.

I can sit here.
Knowing I am typing, yes, this is ME, creating this content.
I hear the wind rustling in the trees next to me, as I sit in my swingy chair on my bedroom balcony.
If I pause and tune in I can hear the noise of the ocean just a 100 metres or so away from me.
I am conscious of the distant sounds of my children playing. I am conscious that I hope I don’t hear those happy sounds suddenly turn to shrieks and screams and battle attacks, because I really don’t want to have to exit this bubble right now.
I hear the garbage truck come by.
I am aware of all of it.
And yet at the same time –

I am aware of none of it because right now I’m in the superflow lane baby, and in this place, where I let myself fall with each moment and twist and turn of the dance ever-deeper into ME?

There really is no me, or them, or world, or anything, and what is coming THROUGH me, and what I am DOING, is directed and supported by something far, far, greater than me.

When I do my business in this way,

I feel supported to a level I can’t even explain. I am not DOING anything. Even though sure, I am. Technically it IS me producing, directing, creating, and also monetising the FARK outta what’s coming through me.

But yet it’s all just … flow.

Here is where I fuck it up though.

Here is where I make it harder on myself.

Here is where I am still learning, about giving in even MORE to me, and simply refusing to show up for the dance if it’s not the FLOW dance. No! I won’t do your scripted ‘have to think about it and try’ dance. I won’t, and you can’t make me!

^^ this is me,
speaking to me.
Who else would it be?!

I fuck it up when I forget that how it WORKS for me is momentum, baby. Doesn’t gotta be some kind of over the top EXXXXTRA momentum, even though sure – I’m a little bit extra 

But no,

it just needs to be that I remain in the dance,
in the movement,
in the flow,
each move unfolding (and only just at the last possible second, when you’re breathless and wide eyed with awareness that you’re already moving into the next step without ANY CLUE OF WHAT IT IS) into the one which comes after it.

A new person in my life, a fascinating new person, but that’s not the story we’re telling, is it now?! Anyway, he recently explained to me how, when he goes to new cities, he likes to go on ‘non-stop walks’. “Everytime the light goes red, or there’s an obstruction, you have to change direction. The idea is you never stop, and you just see where you end up“.

And I thought, yes –

This is how I do business BEST.
This is how I do life BEST.
This is how I do me BEST.

But so many times – and don’t you do this as well, don’t we all?! – I try to make it wrong.

“I should think more”

“I should plan more”

“I should be more organised”

“I should think about what people want”

“I should move with the times”

“I gotta structure things better”

“I gotta work it out”

“I gotta think it out”

“I gotta plan it out”

“Let me get back to you on that”

“Let me add that to my list … the list that slowly and softly is KILLING me as the very existence of a thing which implies that there is ANY thing other than this moment, right here, this dance step, ONLY brought to life as I fall INTO it,

drains my soul
right out of my body
into the bowels of HADES, it might as well be!”

Or, you know –

Something like that.

Here is what I have learned:

>> When I try to make being me wrong, everything falls apart FAST. <<<

But also,

when I try to add to me
when I try to contain me
when I try to structure me
when I try to organise me
when I try to explain me, or make me and what comes out of me more presentable to the world,

and anything like this –

it all just turns to horrible horrible quicksand.

In the thinking, in the considering, in the looking at my list and trying to stay on top of things, remember things, get things done –

I lose my soul.
I lose my joy.
I lose my energy, my motivation, my focus.
I lose what makes ME,

me.

Where do I fuck it up? Where does a crazy soul-led LIVES FOR THE BEAT OF THIS ART messenger like you or I fuck it up?

When we think that the way to improve our art, OR to make more money or be seen, is to pause the BEAT OF THE DANCE WHICH GOT US HERE.

When we forget that the BEST work always and ONLY comes from the flow, the dance, the twirl twirl twirl with life itself, the MADNESS.

When we try and take our crazy,

and put it in a nice little box.

With a ribbon.

And a bow.

And our head tilted just so, to the left, like that.

“Oh, you need to make sure people understand how you can help them! You need to be conscious of what the market wants and needs!”

NO BITCH, NO.

You need to follow the beat of your crazy,

your feet dancing and twirling in whichever way they take you,

carried along by the winds of LIFE ITSELF,

and trust that not ONLY will this result in the NATURAL FREAKIN’ UNFOLDING OF YOU DOING WHATEVER NEEDED TO BE DONE ALONG THE WAY,

but that your band of merry pipers will see you,

their toes will start tapping,

they won’t even know what’s happening,

and they will DANCE ALONG BEHIND YOU IN THE GLORIOUS BEAUTIFUL PERFECT MESS OF IT ALL.

This is how you build a personal brand to 8-figures and beyond,

when you are an artist,

when you are a crazy one,

when you are a messenger who HAS to be IN it to even BREATHE,

and when the very idea of having to DO a single damn thing in business drains the soul right outta you,

but yet you still want all the results.

The question is not if you can let yourself be this free,

the question is only are you willing to trust this big,

and back that you being ALL of you,

which we both know means ZERO forethought and ONLY creating from a place of being IN it,

is enough?

In the end it’s very very simple:

Either you believe you were born for this dance, and so LET GO AND BE IN IT, QUIT TRYING TO PLAN WHAT WAS NEVER MEANT TO BE PLANNED,

or you should quit crowding up the damn floor.

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