Katrina Ruth
Success Mindset

The Real Reason I Don’t Give a Fuck if You Don’t Like Me Saying Fuck

aka:

{How to Unleash the Crazy Mofo Within So You Can Naturally Attract Your True Tribe, Have it Be Easy, Produce Shit You ADORE, and Make Your Millions, on Your Terms}

So I had this, um, CONVERSATION, in a Facebook group I’m part of.

It’s a group of entrepreneurs, women, a big group. A well known group.

And the question that had been posed was around whether or not it’s okay to swear on a sales page. The debate was just kicking off when I dropped in my own feelings, which were pretty tame and (I thought) pretty impossible to argue with.

“Write in a way that feels right for you. This may or may not be how you would speak in real life. It depends on the conversation anyway. There are no RULES as to what should be on a sales page, you get to make the rules”

To me this is (real) entrepreneur / leader 101 type of shit, I mean who is going to argue that you should NOT be allowed to write in a way that feels right for you, that you SHOULD edit or filter what you say, that hell NO you don’t get to make the rules?!

Well apparently – plenty of people.

I came back a day or two later when I noticed a notification on the thread and the debate was RIFE with energy and strong voices for both sides.

Some people (many of whom I friended right away lol as it’s always cool to find new people who think similarly to what you do!) felt as I did – who the fuck cares if you say fuck? Say it, don’t say it, don’t freaking worry about trying to make everybody LIKE you; in business you should show up as YOU and if people don’t like you then why. the heck. would you want THEM in your community?!

Absolutely concur.

Many people though –

Absolutely do not.

“It’s not professional”, they said.

“On a sales page? NEVER”, said another.

“It’s just ugly”

“I would never buy from someone who has to talk in such a low-class way!”

“What are you trying to prove?”

People even directly said it is NOT okay to be the real you or share your true personality!

MADNESS.

And so on and so forth; pretty passionately as well. Heck someone even shared on ARTICLE on how much profanity could be costing your business and you! A real article folks, so it MUST BE TRUE!

And I thought about it, I really did think about keeping my further thoughts out of it because I’m not that active in this group and whenever I do come in it seems I end up either causing some kind of rebel leader mutiny or else I’m just stirring people up.

But sometimes … you gotta stir the pot. Especially when the pot is filled with fucking CONFORMITY and people trying to tell OTHER people that the only way to SUCCESS is to put on a fucking show and dance like a dancing fucking monkey so that the good folks’ll give you some nuts and you can keep on doing your, well, PERFORMANCE.

I mean sure – if YOU want to conform and edit and filter everything you do then go ahead but don’t try and get everyone else to jump off that particular cliff of stupidity with you!

I guess lemmings will always do what they do anyway, but nonetheless, for the purpose of giving hope and reason to those who actually BELIEVE in business on your terms and perhaps needed to hear someone say it’s okay I had to dive in –

“It’s not just about whether you want to be professional /conform.

It’s about the reality that in NOT using your true voice you may miss attracting your true TRIBE, in the same way that if you are a carefully masked ‘appropriate’ or socially acceptable person yes more people might LIKE or ACCEPT you but you may miss those true soulmate connections where you come together magnetically attracted to each other’s particular brand of awesome AND crazy.

If you’re hiding the real you in ANY sense then sure – you might wear a PC appropriate hat and blend in like a good little sheep but the folks who would have vibed with the REAL you; the ones who inevitably as clients would have been way cooler, more fun, more ‘you’ and therefore who you can BEST COMMUNICATE WITH and help?

Won’t even notice you’re fucking there!

Not to mention you made yourself a bed of fucking thorns to keep working from since you now have to keep showing up as not-quite-the-real-you! Long story short … It is easier and more fun being you AND it is the fastest path to making the greatest money as well as having your greatest impact in the way you serve your true tribe…”

The truth is that when I post comments to ‘stir the pot’ it’s not (just!) because I do enjoy doing that and it is DEFINITELY not because I’m interested in trying to ‘convert’ anyone to my way of thinking IF they are happy with how they are doing business / life / etc currently.

When I post stuff like this, the reason is okay yes a) I DO enjoy being a bit of a mischief maker but b) and PRIMARILY because I am speaking to those who either already agree or think this way and therefore I am CALLING THEM OUT – making myself known and essentially inviting some form of connection whether directly then and there or simply the seed of something for the future and I am also shining a light for those who WANT to think this way and believe that business should be on their terms but have perhaps never been told that that’s okay. Perhaps so far everything they’ve learned is to follow the rules, conform, be ‘professional’ (whatever the fuck that means anyway!), to do things a certain way OR ELSE.

Just on a side note … groups of people that tell you you have to do things a certain way OR ELSE are generally NOT groups to associate yourself with if you do happen to have a brain in your head, a desire to think and a desire to LEAD.

Can’t very well lead if you’re following, can you now?

So I’ll be damned if I’m going to stand by and watch people spout the BULLSHIT KIND OF LIES – whether about swearing or about anything else – that tell you that success depends on you following a fucking SYSTEM.

Not.

On.

My.

Watch.

The reality of course is that it’s lucky I AM only saying these sort of things to identify those like-minded kickass ladies like myself because I sure as shit don’t stand a chance at having any of the sheep, I mean people on the other side of the fence even GET what I’m saying!

Take this response, for example, which came in reply to my above comment:

“Do you really think an F bomb or 2 builds a magical connection. I don’t think it’s being anything less of yourself if you refrain from a curse or 2.”

She then went on to question why I would say it’s phony if you DON’T swear.

Um … I didn’t say that!

I DON’T think it’s phony to NOT swear. I think it’s fucking phony to not be you!

Here is another comment which also just made me want to bang my head on the table whilst simultaneously rolling my eyes right back into my neck –

“Never. Ever. Seriously? This whole “it’s cute to swear thing” (I’m seeing it all the time). Is so unpro. I would never hire anyone who thought that was a good idea.”

Who the fuck said it was cute?

The POINT people is BE WHO YOU ARE.

Here is the final reply I left on that thread –

“It’s not about a freaking word. It’s about being you and not QUESTIONING which parts of you you should be. It’s about showing up no filter, the same way you would in life. Of course it depends on your goals. If your goal is to meet the worlds norms and standards of what is right vs wrong, well – good luck with that! If your goal is to build a brand based on showing up and being WHO YOU ARE – no filter, no editing, no fucking mask so that oh gosh I hope people LIKE me, then you act accordingly … and hell yeah some people won’t like you for it but my point is that for me I would take that ANY day over thinking I have to put on a show in order to share my true message and calling with the world. What’s more I can NOT share my TRUE message and voice if I AM first thinking about how I need to present myself. And let me tell you … there is no better feeling than making a crapload of money just by showing up and being you and seeing that the greatest transformation you can have in OTHERS lives came about when you stopped giving a fuck about what the world thought of you and just shared what came from your heart HOWEVER IT CAME OUT.”

So here’s my whole point HERE, and the purpose of today’s post –

YES if you stand up and be fully you in business some people might (will!) not like it, find it or you to be unprofessional, unattractive, low class (best thing I ever got called was an old wrinkly bogan!!), pathetic or just plain and simple NOT a turn on.

THAT’S OKAY.

More than that it is freaking ESSENTIAL if you actually want to be able to then OPERATE your business – and life! – fully on your terms where you get to just show up every day and be you!

I don’t say this for reasons of wanting to flout my own success, but seriously? I have a MILLION DOLLAR BUSINESS where I not only GET to just show up every day and walk, talk, think, act like BE me and NEVER do I think about what’s okay or allowed I just BE FUCKING ME the same way I would with my besties, but also the reason I HAVE this success and the reason it flowed so EASILY was because I stopped. worrying. about. what. people. think!

So if you find my language unattractive THEN LEAVE. I am totally fine with NOT attracting YOU to me because I am only interested in (wait for it!) –

Attracting people who like the real me.

Just like a girl waiting for her knight in shining armour to appear I WANT TO BE LOVED FOR WHO I AM.

But apparently the ‘rules’ in the entrepreneurial world state that hey! If you wanna attract clients and have people like you – if you wanna ever get a date honey let alone laid or MARRIED! – then you better primp and preen and shine your shiny hair till it fucking glows because don’t you know you’re supposed to be PRETTY?

Don’t you know that good girls are POLITE?

Don’t you know that a woman who wants to be loved and looked after has to ACT A CERTAIN WAY?

I mean what the actual fuck, guys?

Is this really how you want to do business?

You REALLY not only think that this is what’s NECESSARY to do business but you also think it’s a good fucking plan for your own happiness, satisfaction, joy, fulfilment and also ABILITY TO LET YOUR LIGHT SHINE?

It’s fucking not!

Just as you might attract in a ’10’ partner by putting on the right hair and makeup and doing the right things that a good wife does and then have to spend the ENTIRE REST OF YOUR FUCKING LIFE continuing to be that person so you don’t scare them off or lose their love, if you have to in ANY way ‘turn it on’ to attract clients then girl that’s just SAD but also you’re setting yourself up for MASSIVE AND ETERNAL STRESS.

And you will NEVER – EVER – this way be able to have the impact into the lives of others that you were BORN to have because you’re not bloody well being you which means you’re not giving ALL of you.

And here’s what else:

EVERY part of business is more difficult when you’ve based the entire fucking escapade on you + mask.

Your focus day to day is on appearing as you should; presenting yourself a certain way –

You’re worried about whether or not people like / respect / are impressed by you –

Which means you filter everything you say or do and probably also act slightly if not fully schizo, because of course in order to have everyone LIKE you you’re going to have to wear a lot of fucking masks –

All of this is pretty distracting and draining so you do NOT step fully into yourself –

You are LESS guided by intuition –

You are LESS likely to really tap into your true purpose, calling, message –

You will NOT feel passionate and enthused and filled with constant energy from what you’re doing, not in the way you do EVERY SINGLE DAY when your business is based on you being you –

Your creative juice will dry the fuck up –

Which will make it harder for you to produce awesome shit –

Which will make it harder for you to attract ANYONE onto your mailing less let alone your TRUE tribe –

And you can bet your ass your TRUE tribe won’t even notice you because you’re not BEING THEIR LEADER –

You’ll struggle to come up with ideas for products to sell, and the stuff that you do come up with will be so yawn-worthy that even a University wouldn’t accept it for curriculum –

You’ll struggle to get people to pay you when you do finally launch, even though you followed ALL the rules (SUCH a good little sheepling you are!), because there’s no fucking SOUL in it –

Basically you WILL be in the 99.99% of entrepreneurs who FAIL so you might as well just GIVE UP NOW and save yourself a ton of time, money, energy and emotion and clear some space on the internet for someone who actually fucking has something to say.

So.

If you want to attract your true tribe.

If you want it to be EASY.

If you want a business that revolves around you just showing up every day and being the awesome crazy mofo you actually are.

If you want to have extra cool creative shit just pour out of you and it just WORKS and people practically THROW money at you because they just want to be AROUND you.

If you want to PINCH yourself every day because it is so ridiculous that you get to make money this way and you love it SO MUCH.

And if you want to not only MAKE millions but impact millions along the way, doing it TOTALLY on your terms.

Then for the love of God and ALL things holy STOP WORRYING ABOUT WHAT YOU SHOULD DO, or what will WORK and for once in your life, FINALLY and then FOREVER just show up.

And be you.