Purpose

SEDUCED BY THE THING WHICH IS HARDEST, MOST TIME-CONSUMING, MOST DRAINING TO YOUR SOUL

I’ve never really been one to be seduced by the quick fix.

Even back when I was 17 years old, or thereabouts, and unbeknownst to my parents signed up for a good old-fashioned make -money-by-mailing-envelopes scheme, it wasn’t really the idea of making a lot of money fast, if everybody did what the letter said to do and mailed me back $20, it was more the idea of possibility and of my own willingness to do the work.

Of course I would sit in my bedroom and print, stamp, address and mail 2000 envelopes! Why would the people NOT all send back their $20? I sent mine! It was logical to anyone that if we all just kept the thing going, it was gonna work. It HAD to. Just do the work, do what it takes, it’s impossible for it not to work if we all just work it!

Well, I took a PO box out (so as to maintain the secret and not receive all that mail to the house), and I waited for the influx and I received … $80.

The MORE straight up pyramid scheme I got myself into about 2 years later fared infinitely better comparatively, as obviously there were more people beneath me willing to (ahem) do the work, aka keep the thing going, and the 4k my friend and I put in did indeed turn into 16k. Winning!

So I guess, sure, I’ve been as much of a sucker on these and other occasions for a bit of a get rich quick scheme, and in actual fact the 4k thing really DID ‘make us rich quick’. I then used my part to buy my best friend who I grew up with in Germany a return ticket to come visit me in Australia. Which I look back on and think – what an interesting choice. I instantly released that money, and not even directly for myself.

I guess I just always trusted in more money being available whenever I really needed it.

But like I said, what it’s really been about for me, is possibility.

I’m a sucker for possibility, and I SEE possibility everywhere. Spend 50k having a perfect webinar script and slides developed to sell my membership program? Of course! (This was nearly a decade ago).

Shell out another 50k here, 60 there, 75 there, for ‘the’ mentors who were going to teach me ‘the’ sales and marketing strategies I ‘had’ to know? OBVIOUSLY! And I’d do the work too.

Invest endless endless hours into fine-tuning or tweaking things myself that clearly needed time and attention and effort and wisdom and MORE time, because that was ‘obviously what the next level of my business required’? NO DOUBT.

I’ve always been willing to do what it takes to get to where I wanna go, and it’s never really been about whether ‘what it takes’ is just a few (thousand) little envelopes made, or a few dozen hours spent dotting the i’s and crossing the t’s on a perfect marketing plan, it’s ALWAYS just been about –

I want that goal and Imma gonna get it.

This morning I was journaling on the phrase ‘seduced by our desires’. I jotted it down, a line from one of the books I’m reading, and didn’t really know why it spoke to me.

“What AM I seduced by?”, I asked myself, thinking as I did so about things that are ‘obvious’ points of seduction to people who market and message online.

Quick fixes came to mind instantly, and I sort of played it over in my mind, wondering if that is something that ‘gets’ me. And then it hit me –

I’m far more easily seduced by complex drawn-out difficult things, than what I am by so-called quick fixes.

If I look at my business history, and all of the bits that happened BEFORE I got to the whole ‘flow and receiving all the monies with ease’ bit … and even back and forth numerous times thereafter … the patterns are pretty clear:

Give me something REALLY hard, REALLY convoluted, REALLY against my own true nature, REALLY requiring of diligent time and effort and focus and application and what I’m gonna call ‘proper-making’ … and (my previous self) is all over that shit.

I’ve flown countless hours around the world, spent hundreds of thousands of dollars collectively, and at a guess probably thousands of hours,

never mind the ensuing hair-pulling out and heartache and contracted energy and fallout of all of THAT, which follows,

questing after the outcomes of ‘if I finally do it properly | right | like them’.

You know –

If I do it the way the cool kids are doing it.

If I do it like the people I respect or fear are doing it.

If I do it like the ones I don’t feel good enough for are doing it.

If I do it like the ones I don’t know how to be around, be myself around, are doing it.

If I DO IT LIKE THE BITS OF ME THAT DON’T NATURALLY DO IT WOULD DO IT.

Or something to that effect.

Back when I was stuffing envelopes, going to dodgy ass pyramid scheme meetings, getting my fingers into every different MLM I came across (learned a LOT of epic stuff there by the way!), what I was doing was pursuing possibility.

My head was turned by every possible hustle, just about. And by the idea of creating something from nothing, and also – something from work. Anything I got involved in that required me to learn and implement effective sales, marketing, communication, I did it.

I was always one of the top if not the top sales person.

And I learned some INCREDIBLE stuff, like I said.

But back then … that was all just gradually helping me to find my way. To find ME.

In a way I guess that is also true about all the money and time and effort I spent on various marketing whatnots online.

But at a certain point, here is what I realised:

The harder and more convoluted and more dot-joining and ‘do it proper like’ things were all the things that took me OFF path of what ultimately worked.

Because what ultimately worked, and what I live by now, what has allowed me to create this life … create multiple 8-figures in soul-led income … impact thousands and thousands of clients to also see what’s inside of them come to life, in business, in money, AND in life … and do it all in a way where every day I’m doing the thing I ALWAYS WANTED TO JUST BE LEFT ALONE TO DO …

was just doing the thing I always wanted to be left alone to do.

And ignoring ALL the other stuff.

That thing, for me, is just writing and speaking what comes out of me each day. Going into the depths of my own psyche and soul, and seeing what comes out.

DOING that, saying YES to that, SUBMITTING to it bit by bit and eventually fully, is EXACTLY what formed the foundation, the walls, the roof, the entire damn building of this business, and of everything I’ve been able to create in my life and in the lives of others from it.

And?

THAT WAS ALWAYS THE EASY THING.

I just thought, spent a whole bunch of years thinking, that surely all the complex ‘hard work’ stuff was THE stuff that would free me.

And that’s the thing, isn’t it?

We grow up so conditioned to believe that doing things against our own nature is what delivers results, and rewards.

But talk to a single person who is TRULY changing the game with what they do and truly in LOVE with what they do, and you’ll find this.

Yeah, they ‘worked their ass off’. But the actual REALLY hard or hardest work that HAD to be done?

Was being brave enough to go into the part of them that ‘always just wanted to – ‘,

and letting that be the rule.

Today, I have a simple rule:

If it feels convoluted.

If it feels endless.

If it feels draining.

If it feels like ‘I should’.

I DEFINITELY SHOULD NOT.

Anyone watching me would think ‘fuck, she works hard; she works her butt off’.

But actually?

All I do is get up and be the me I always wanted to be.

I suggest you do the same.