THESE ARE THE THINGS THEY SAY ABOUT A WOMEN LIKE YOU. A WOMAN LIKE ME
She’s too loud.
She’s too much.
She’s too demanding.
She’s too INTENSE.
She constantly wants to be the centre of attention!
She’s unREASONABLE.
She’s SO over the top.
She’s draaaaiiinniinnngggg …
She’s SO full on.
Do you think she realises how she is?
Why doesn’t she get what people think about her?
These are the things.
They things they say.
A small selection of them.
A small selection of the things they say, about a woman like you, a woman like me, women like US.
These are the things.
Just a few of the things.
Which we hear.
In a whisper –
Or a sideways glance –
Or ‘helpfully’ reported back to us.
These are the things.
A few of the CUTTING things.
Which we’ve heard, since as far back as we can remember, since we were so young, exuberantly expressing all that we are to the world, feeling excited, excited to SHARE our excitement and joy with others, excited for LIFE, and just letting it bubble over, letting it flow out, getting a little silly, a little ridiculous, and DEFINITELY loud, and then all of a sudden –
A frown of annoyance
A stare of ‘be quiet’
Or something more direct
Telling us –
You’re doing it wrong.
YOU DON’T FIT IN.
As a child, we learn –
Oh.
How embarrassing …
I didn’t … mean to ..
Was I?
Oh
Okay
And we continue on, a little compressed perhaps, but not too much, because hey – what’s inside us is inside us, and who we are is who we ARE! Sooner or later it just comes out again.
And inevitably, sooner or later, comes the feedback again, and once again, the things are said.
Do you HAVE to be like that? ALL the time?
And we learn –
To be a little quieter
To dress more compliantly
Away with the EXTRA craziness
Stand out, of course, that’s what the world will SAY to you – !
Just, you know –
Not too much.
And not so that you’re DIFFERENT to us.
And please –
A little less energy.
And eventually –
What was once so natural, so perfect, the only way it COULD be, becomes something which is wheeled out rustily, if alcohol is involved, or maybe just with our VERY best friends, where we can truly BE who we are, but mostly?
It fades away.
*
I was thinking about this earlier today after hearing recently, well, some things.
I was told some things.
Things which people think.
About a woman like me.
About a woman like you.
And it’s funny …
It’s been so long. So long since I remembered or noticed that PEOPLE THINK WE’RE TOO MUCH.
I’ve SO effectively built this tribe –
This life –
My WORLD –
Around WOMEN LIKE YOU AND ME.
To me it’s normal …
It ONLY lifts me …
I would never have it any other way, and I long ago let GO of the masks I’d heaped upon me. I tapped back in to ME, and I let that wild woman out. It’s a continual process, of course, but yes –
It took me by surprise.
It took my breath away.
It SHOCKED me, actually.
To hear people say –
The things I used to hear so much –
The things I AM aware are thought –
About a woman –
Such as you –
And such as me.
I felt sadness come up, as I heard –
Too much
Too intense
I feel drained
WOW ….
Does she REALISE?
I was startled, actually, I did NOT get it! And then, as it sunk in –
Grief
Emotion
And the remembrance of a time when I bought into the BULLSHIT that it’s NOT okay
To be like this
To live like this
To be a woman like you
Or a woman like me
But here is what next, once the grief passed, once I realised, once it HIT me –
HOLY FUCK.
This is EVERYTHING.
And THANK YOU.
For the reminder
For the remembrance
That there is a REASON that we come together
There is a REASON we live this life
There is a REASON
That a woman like me
And a woman like you
Find each other
Create the businesses we do
Do all the things
And insist –
On having it all
And today, here is what I want to say to you –
THANK FUCK FOR A WOMAN LIKE YOU IN MY LIFE
And while we’re at it??
Thank fuck I get to be this woman too.
And let’s not forget what happens when they say such things, to a woman like YOU, a woman like ME:
Ultimately, however long it may take us, we speak back. And this is what we say:
Of course.
Of course we are those things.
BECAUSE WE ARE THE ONES CRAZY AND DEMANDING AND DRIVEN ENOUGH TO RUN THIS THING.
So fuck all y’all.
Sit back.
And watch.
Get the value.
Or don’t.
Either way, admit –
You can’t look away 
With a woman like me. A woman like us.
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