THE THING WHICH YOU GET FASCINATED AND EXCITED BY IN OTHERS, IS THE THING YOU SHOULD DO
Pay attention, and listen closely, because what I’m about to tell you could VERY well not only stop you from creating the wrong life, but could also save you a fuckload of money, time, energy, emotion, your LIFE and in doing so provide you absolute time, freedom and FUCK YES certainty to pursue the Thing Which You Were Born to Do Yet Refuse to Take Ownership Over.
And the best part? You’ll know how to apply this to YOU as soon as you read my story and philosophy here –
Quite recently, I walked away from something that sounded insanely seductive, amazing, appealing, and was maybe EVERYTHING I’ve ever wanted or certainly everything a driven girl wanting to be seen and heard could dream of.
At the time I tore myself apart from the inside out trying to figure out whether it was my GUT telling me to walk away or whether fear and self-sabotage was trying to have its wiley way with me again and I should WOMAN THE FUCK UP AND FOLLOW THROUGH.
You know when something is a REALLY big decision, and you’re really caught up in emotion around it, and you can’t seem to just KNOW, as you so often do in so many less important areas?
Yeah … that.
I analysed this thing till the cows came home, went to sleep, and went back out again for the next day.
I went back and forth with my team, my best friends, my journal, and even my blow dry girl (obvs; the woman knows everything about me!).
And still I couldn’t figure it out.
There were SO many reasons this was a GOOD thing, an AMAZING thing, EVERYthing, in fact, but yet the YES I needed to give just wouldn’t come out of me. Instead I found myself picking over details, analysing whats and ifs, and tossing and turning through the night as I drove myself insane wondering if really I was just being a CRYBABY about stepping outside of my comfort zone.
Sometimes when you think that maybe your gut is saying NO, really what’s happening is you’re just anxious about going through the inevitable pain that comes with GROWTH. They don’t call it growing pains for naught!
Anyway –
To be perfectly honest with you, even though I made my decision some time back, it’s still been something I wrestled with. Did I choose WRONG? Did I screw it UP? Am I CRAZY, to say NO to that?!
And then, this. And the reason for this blog –
This morning I was reading a blog written by James Altucher (my favourite blogger and second favourite writer!), and in passing he mentioned John Grisham. He said –
“One time I was visiting a hedge fund that managed John Grisham’s money. They told me, “Every time John Grisham writes a book we get another $20 million to invest.”
Straight away I stopped reading the blog and began writing this, 5 minutes ago. Because what HIT me in that moment was not that John Grisham is clearly marketable AF, and not even that I’ve obsessively read everything he ever wrote since I was a teenager, but more so that I right away felt that RUSH inside of me when his name was mentioned.
And the RUSH is partly because yes, I’m a John fan, and yes, I know enough of his back story to know he was knocked back as an author and FOLLOWED THE FUCK THROUGH till he made it, but mostly – ?
It was the rush I feel whenever my soul gets wind of somebody succeeding in a world-famous and without question OVERT manner as an author.
I get the same rush when I think of my client, Lili St Germain, who said to me on our first conversation maybe 3 years ago that she wanted to be a full-time author, a best-selling one, and who 5 months later had quit her job and made 100k self-publishing on Amazon, who then got OFFERED (as you do!) a 6-figure book deal from Harper Collins … they came to HER … and who is now a USA Today best-selling author! I keep her books on my bookstand and I get EXCITED each time I see them, in a way that transcends even hearing a client did a 100k launch, made their first million, got on TV, etc!
You know what else you’ll find on my bedside table, actually, my two bedside tables?
Piles.
And piles.
Of books.
Lili’s books.
John Grisham’s books.
Jeffrey Archer books (if you haven’t read Jeffrey Archer and you call yourself a lover of writing GET YOUR SHIT TOGETHER … and put aside a spare month or so as you won’t want to put them down)
Piles and piles of personal development books of all sorts and shapes and sizes.
And about 50 kids books too 🙂
I actually don’t even know how I ended up with so many books on my little tables; I swear there were only about 4 on each a few months ago and now there seems to be a leaning tower of Pisa-esque situation going on either side.
Over the past few years, it’s safe to say I’ve read several million words of online success stories, case studies, and invaluable advice on all areas of BUSINESS and success in general.
Wanna know what I remember, what I would go back to?
When Tim Ferriss wrote about how to get a 7-figure book deal.
When James Altucher wrote (multiple times) about how to self-publish, why to self-publish over anything else.
When he interviewed Steve Scott about how Steve makes 40k+ (more now) a month self-publishing on Amazon.
When I then obsessively searched everything on Steve, listened to all his podcast interviews, purchased a program from him so I could get the free 30-minute 1:1 he offered as a fast-action bonus, wrote down EVERYTHING he said to do.
When I first read Write Publish Repeat, then obsessively looked up and followed everything those 3 guys do.
When I first came across Mark Messick who had major self-published success at 16, obsessively read everything of his, and about him
When I first heard of Amanda Hocking and obsessively read everything about HER insane self-published success.
When I first encountered John Locke, read all HIS stuff obsessively (awesome books btw!) but also read his book on how he created his self-published success, and then forced my Dad and everybody else I could influence on reading at the time to read it too.
When I first came across Tom Corson-Knowles who was then making 10k/ month self-publishing on Amazon; more now.
When I then did Tom’s Udemy course and would listen and be inspired and imagine that being me while I did my cardio at the gym.
When I then paid him 1k for a one hour session and wrote down EVERYTHING he said to do.
And so many other stories, of so many other writers, of those who said FUCK it and decided to follow their WRITING dream, and do it their way, and then they MADE it.
Want to know something funny? In all of the above situations, as I dreamed and made notes and imagined what it would be like, I already HAD a million dollar online business!! I wasn’t exactly sitting on my haunches not achieving, but in the moments where I read about somebody making it big as an author, about somebody publishing loads of books, it’s like nothing else I’ve ever done or ever will do matters.
Do you ever feel that way? Is there something which, when you think about it, COMPLETELY captures your attention and all of a sudden you don’t give a single flying fuck about ANYTHING and you MUST KNOW EVERYTHING ABOUT THAT TOPIC OR THE PERSON WHO ACHIEVED AT IT.
What is it that’s coming to mind for you right now?
What is the THING, which you find you just HAVE to delve into, when you hear about somebody doing it?
What are the things you REMEMBER, from all of the stuff you’ve read, learned, absorbed these past few years?
What stands out for you?
This is the thing it’s really about for you, I can promise you that.
The thing which you’re excited by in others and obsessively want to know HOW they freaking DID it, is the THING YOU’RE MEANT TO DO.
And the DANGEROUS trap so many of us fall into, is to put our time, our energy, our money, our emotion, our LIFE, into pursuing something that looks very much like this thing.
That is CLOSELY related to this thing.
And that perhaps, in a roundabout way, could even GET us to this thing.
But yet it’s not the thing.
Want to know something REALLY weird and funny, which just occurred to me? For some reason I never get as excited, in fact I never even pay attention, when somebody new hits the NYT list!! This is bizarre to me, as it’s ‘always’ been my dream to be on that list.
But no, I can’t say I’ve ever sat down and obsessively read stories of how people made it. I definitely want the goal … but it’s an ego goal. There’s nothing wrong with ego goals! So long as they’re not followed at the expense of SOUL goals. And the soul goal, for me, is the writing. Of books. MANY books. ENDLESS books. And the building, of an empire of them, on my terms.
How about you?
And then – are you DOING it?
Are you making SPACE for it? Even 30 minutes a day to pursue this DREAM which you were BORN for?! The only reason I completed my first book, was because I started to put aside 30 minutes a day to write. 25 for the writing, 5 for recalibrating or doing follow up tasks relevant to the writing.
I know from hard-won experience that COMMONLY what happens, even for us driven folks, perhaps ESPECIALLY for us, is that we put our big dream, the thing we really want, up on a pedestal.
And we tell ourselves:
That’s too hard.
That’s not for me.
I don’t know how.
It’s scary!
I’m not GOOD enough!
But meanwhile we try and move HEAVEN AND FUCKING EARTH to do a whole bunch of other stuff which actually is, in a logical sense, just as hard or requires just as much effort, but yet because it’s not the thing we REALLY want, we don’t have the same resistance around it and we’re just pragmatic about it.
Well, here’s an idea:
What if, today, you decided to take that big one day dream down off its motherfucking shelf, dust it off, and simply apply yourself to it.
In a very PRACTICAL and non-romantic one foot in front of the other sort of a way.
Do you think –
That if you dedicated 30 minutes a day to pursuing your ACTUAL thing –
That one day people might be reading about how YOU did it?
Or would you prefer to stay on the outside, looking in, achieving a whole bunch of stuff it was NEVER MEANT TO BE ABOUT, ’cause hey –
You’re a go getter, baby! You get shit DONE! Just not the actual shit because that’s harrrddddddddd!
Go get the thing you were always meant to get gorgeous.
And you know what else? Do it starting TODAY, because after all:
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